[footfootfoot]

Try something like this:

Q: What color is that pen?
A: Why do you ask? What color do you think it is? Is there something wrong with your eyes? Are you colorblind?
Q: ?
A: Is there anything else on your so-called mind?
Q: (rolls eyes) You've told me nothing about that pen. How can you not know more about that pen? In fact, why did you even show up without the pen knowledge you were mystically expected to know inside and out?
A: Don't roll your eyes at me. That's childish, unprofessional, disrespectful, and rude. Is that how your mother brought you up? To be childish and rude? I have to get back to working on that project about construction paper. Please stop wasting my time.
Q: Construction paper? That's not done yet? Why not?
A: Umm, because people like you keep interrupting me with stupid questions about pens that they should be able to answer themselves?
Q:Well I just don't know what I'm going to do. You're obviously not playing on the team and you have no comprehension about anything that is going on.
A: You're bouncing all over the place like a kid with ADHD who's just drank a Big Gulp. Maybe you could stick to one topic at a time, or better yet, leave me alone so I can get some work done, since I am the only person in the office who actually does any work. Unless you call pen color interrogation work...
Q: (mean bird look): You haven't even gotten back to me about the paper clips and the window blinds.
A: Yes I did. You must have forgotten. In fact I told you twice. You keep asking me about them, what's that all about? Are you coming on to me? Because I'm getting this serious stalker vibe from you that makes me feel very uncomfortable.
Q: ??
A: Have you been taking your medication? You seem a little... scattered and confused. Would you like me to call someone for you?
Q: (look of pure disgust) Go to your room without dinner
A: OK, but it's lunch time and I'm in my room right now. Remember? You came into my room to ask me about the pen. Remember the pen? Seriously, I'm worried about you.