I don't think i will ever really get over the moment i was shoved off the pedestal i never asked to be on. But i was young, and believed if he put me up there then i must be special, 'this' must be special.
Now i'm on solid ground, and i don't have far to fall if that moment came again. There are no guarantees...so i have to build my own self-worth.
Someone who loves you wants you to have that feeling of self-worth, too. It takes patience and kindness, especially in extreme cases. When someone loves you for exactly who you are you might take the bad things about you (in your eyes, due to the past) out of a box and present them, one by one, saying 'see this?' And hearing in return 'so? That's part of you.' 'Oh, well what about this?' 'Still you, and i still love you.'
What? Where are the berating words? Where is the meanness?
But those words don't come, and i slowly believe in in myself, in 'this.'
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