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Old 03-04-2004, 12:36 PM   #168
Brigliadore
stays crispy in milk
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: A strange planet called Utah
Posts: 270
Quote:
Originally posted by staceyv
Is the type of love he can give, the type of love I want and need?
yes, with the one exception.(trust issues)
This answer tells me that you don't have the answer to my question yet. But thats ok. No one said you needed the answer today. As long as you keep this question (Is the type of love he can give, the type of love I want and need?) in your mind then at some point the answer will become clear. It will be a yes or no answer with no exceptions or buts attached. I applaud you Stacy for trying to stick this out. Perhaps the relationship can be salvaged, and only by staying can you find that out. But I ask that you maintain a sense of reality through all the working out so that you don't stay longer then you need to. The one issue you mention as being a problem in the relationship (the trust) may well be the one thing he cant change. As under toad said, maybe he is passive aggressive. That doesn't make him a dick, but it does mean he may not be able to change that. Therapy may help, for a while but I suspect he will revert to his old ways after some time has passed. This is the part that worries me. I worry that he will change for the time being, you will go back to being happy and a year or two down the road you will be facing these exact same problems. By then you have invested several more years in the marriage and it will be ever harder to leave. And what if that time he doesn't want to go to therapy again? These things are not something I can answer for you. Only you can know when you are happy, and only you can judge (if/when the time comes) when you need to get out of the marriage. I do wish you luck on whatever the outcome is.
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