[Stormieweather]

I agree, Bruce, that men can be and are abused. Abuse is not just man on woman or adult on child. Women abuse men frequently, more frequently than we are know, because men are loathe to admit to it. My support site has several male members, one of whom is a biker whom you'd never suspect could or would be abused. And yet, he was.

Abuse can be between anyone where the balance of power is unequal. Because abuse is control over another and that requires power. Men often use physical abuse, because they are usually physically stronger than women. Adults are bigger and more knowledgeable, so they abuse children. Bosses abuse employees, religious leaders abuse followers, etc. Abuse can be emotional, financial, verbal, physical, sexual, and spiritual. It's not just threats to kill or hitting.

I'm not sure the laws themselves need to be changed much, but the application of them and the bias/misconception of law enforcement and the general public. When the police show up to a call, they need to understand that just because there are no black eyes or bruises, that isn't necessarily a sign of lack of abuse. Judges need to recognize that there is more to abuse than punching. Generally, people need to be able to speak up about it and be believed. The main reason victims on my site say they didn't say or do anything earlier is fear that no one would believe them or that they would be accused of exaggerating. They even doubt themselves, so why would anyone else take their issues seriously?

So education.

Educate everyone from children all the way up to judges about abuse and what it is. Bullying is a form of abuse and we are not doing nearly enough about it. Spousal abuse goes both ways. Let women and men know that they don't have to tolerate mistreatment, that everyone deserves to be treated with respect. That there is life beyond an abusive partner; actual people who do not abuse. Put in place help for former victims to gain confidence and esteem, and learn healthy ways to interact. Prevent the cycle from reoccurring.