I gave a blowjob to Barney the dinosaur because I smoked crack.
Sheesh, you try to do better in life but all these awful truths come back to haunt you.
Barney seemed ok with it. *shrug* He was all like 'i love you' and I'm like yeah who doesn't buddy and he's all like 'you love me' and I was all WHOA big fella I just want my twenty bucks.
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