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i also posted that i don't want to break up,either. i want to believe him and continue with a happy life. all this is too stressful. then i start thinking "what if it' s all a lie?" i am completely torn in two directions. we sat down and made an agreement with each other on ways to rebuild my trust. he says he will go to counseling, he will not talk to or e-mail or see that girl ever again, he says he won't even go out without me. he says he will give me all of his account numbers and i can read his e-mails if i want, that he will not hide things and that he will be 100% honest with me, even if it might upset me...basically, anything i threw in the air, he was like "sure, i'll do that...i'll do anything you say" but i also told him that my trust will probably only be fully won when he has a greencard and he is still with me. if he really wanted to, sure, he could open a secret e-mail account, he could lie instead of 100% honesty policy, he could say he has to work late and do whatever. all of these things he agreed to did not restore my trust in him, but it looks like he is willing to do anything to try. his only response to "why did you write those letters?!" is "i don't know, i really don't know...i'm twisted, i know it was perverted, unfaithful, i don't know"
this is where we stand now. i guess only time will tell.
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