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I think most people have confident, smooth days, and also awkwrd, ground-swallow-me-up-wtf-did-I-say-that? days. The trick is recognising that other people cannot see your internal world. What happens inside your head doesn't necessarily show on the outside. Which is a fabulous lesson to learn if you intend to do any public speaking. What may well feel like a massive show of nerves and stumbling, often only presents to others as a slight stilt in the words, and a momentary pause for thought.
Back to the OP though: I think the big difficulty here is that he hasn;t experienced a serious long-term relationship. It's much easier to come to conclusions about what you want and what will make you happy if you have some frame of reference. And the thing we think we want can take on epic proportions if we never have a chance to demystify it by experiencing it.
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