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Monster, when you get international sponsorship, I'll spend the night in a real haunted house with you.
We're both sceptics, but I'll be the shrieky one.
We can tie it in with a programme/ book about ex-pats vs stay-behinds.
Or those who love the Barrowman and those who don't.
Or kids vs cats.
You know the score - nothing about "real" people is complete without some sort of ideological conflict.
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Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac
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