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Old 08-18-2011, 07:01 AM   #2
DanaC
We have to go back, Kate!
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 25,964
Contentment is something that has to be an inner thing, it cannot come from external sources.

Setting aside the obvious exception of clinical depression, happiness and contentment are a conscious choice. You have to reach for it.

Guilt over things said and done in the past is pointless and just keeps you awake unnecessarily for something that can't be repaired. Let go, move on.

It doesn't matter who likes or dislikes you, if you don't like yourself you cannot be comfortable in your own skin. Be kind to yourself, and that includes being kind to your younger self in memory.

Live in the now. Fantasy is lovely, daydreaming, I do a lot, but avoid daydreaming about the past, it brings yearning and can never be truly revisited, and avoid daydreaming about the future, it raises too many existential questions :p

The only way to avoid stasis and stagnation is to do/see/experience new things. If doing this is scary, try not to think about it too deeply just agree to things outside your comfort zone and deal with the panic later :p

Sometimes it's good to take on too many things at once. If I have nothing urgent to do, I will end up doing nothing.

Similar to the above, but: the Now is all that you really own. You can plan for old age, you can plan for when you move house, you can dream of your ship coming in. But the sky can fall in without warning at any time. So, grab what happiness you can and shape your life as close to what you want as you can get. Be honest to yourself about what that is. It may not be the thing you dreamed of when you were young.

Try to be flexible. Ride with the punches. Everything changes. This is the one thing we can be sure of. In times of trouble, know that it will pass. In good times, know that too will pass and try not to be phased when it does :p My life used to feel like a roller coaster of crisis and joy. Now, I pretty much stroll through life. I take things as they come, mostly. I find my happiness where I can, and have no shame in seeking joy in ephemera.
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There's only so much punishment a man can take in pursuit of punani. - Sundae
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Last edited by DanaC; 08-18-2011 at 07:07 AM.
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