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Every day reveals to me a new level of how bad I've become. Today, and worst yet, a glimpse of how bad this all makes jinx feel. Through my selfishness, and gluttony, I've hurt not only her trust, but her feeling of self worth. I admit to feeling sorry for myself when this first happened, and being scared for my future.... fear of being alone, and the humiliation of the rejection.... but the way I feel right now? that I've made her feel like she deserved this for some reason? like there's something wrong with her?
This is no joke. not even a little bit.
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This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality
Embrace this moment, remember
We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan
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