Actually, before the La Oliva adventure I had already eaten - no pics though. I went to another recommended place for brunch. I'd travelled through the night after all, arriving Central Amsterdam approx 11.00. So feeling terribly tired and a bit sick (I didn't sleep on the coach) I dropped off my bags and went on a walking tour.
My research paid off - while walking I saw so many of the things I read about - I was pretty well oriented from the word go from poring over the map so long. I walked out to Bagels & Beans. When I got in and stood still for the first time in about 20 hours, I felt the floor vibrating under my feet. I asked the waitress whether it was moving. It wasn't. I said, "I haven't been to a coffeeshop!"
Bless the Dutch, they're used to it. I went to sit outside just in case - it was very disconcerting. Only to find the cobbles under my feet were doing the same thing. The feeling didn't dissipate for hours! But that's why I was drinking water with my meal above anyway.
The next adventure after La Oliva was the tour of the Red Light District. Randy Roy's Red Light Tour to be exact. It cost 12.50 euros (all money will be in euros from now on - I can't be bothered to find the euro symbol!) which included a drink. Not bad for nearly two hours entertainment.
We were a group of six including me, and our guide, who moved from the Netherlands to America when he was nine, and came back on the death of his parents a couple of years ago. He obviously loved his city and was very proud of it. He was an informative and personable guide; he managed to talk to all of us about our lives in the course of the tour.
We went into places I would never have dared go. One alley in particular - the thinnest alley in Amsterdam, you had to squeeze sideways if anyone else was coming through - I simply would not have wanted to go through. There were girls working each side of it; you could easily touch both windows at the same time if you wanted to.
It was surprisingly full-on. As we went past a sex club the man on the door called out and offered us a family discount
I'm pretty sure he was joking - there are quite a few Red Light Tours and he would have recognised us as such. The girls were very close to their windows, the pavements very narrow in places and they were very proactive, tapping on windows, beckoning people in. Some girls worked two to a booth - there was a specific area for girls offering threesomes. There were also areas for silicon, African, Asian etc.
We also went past the Casa Rosso - a famous sex cabaret. The notable thing about that was that the owner had bought swans at some point in the past, and released them onto the canal. They dispersed during the day, but at night came home to the stretch of canal in front of the club. There were dozens of them! So my Amsterdam tip - if you go to the Red Light District at night, take bread. Both kinds.
We ended in a locals bar. Very snug and cosy (
gessilig). I wanted to go back there, but after all it would have been less fun on my own.
Below is a picture of a heron on a car, because I didn't take my camera to the RLD as advised. It's not dangerous, but the working girls will not tolerate photos being taken - to the extent they will charge out and "confiscate" your camera, so it's best to leave it in the hotel rather than be tempted.