Quote:
Originally Posted by Aliantha
FTR, I don't think UT was suggesting you should adjust your boundaries. I think he was telling you that if you've set your boundaries in such a way that others step on them, it's inevitable that you're going to be annoyed. I don't see him telling you to change them. Only that you decided what they are, and your option is to live with your choice, or change it. He then went on to suggest that he has learned that sometimes it's just easier to change your boundaries/expectations than to wish someone else would change theirs to suit you.
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Exactly how I read it too Ali.
I have a similar situation with my mom, asking her to leave me alone doesn't work though, so I've had no choice except to learn to tune it out. If she asks a question and demands an answer, I usually say "I stopped paying attention." Either she gets pissed and walks off or she repeats the question if it was actually important. She'll talk to me from the other room, and I just say "Can't understand you" and go back to ignoring her.
As a side-note, we do have good and important conversations. She just likes to also try to convert me, or tell me how exactly I should live, that's when I start tuning her out.