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I was thinking about this thread in relation to going to church.
I know it would make my parents very happy.
I am trying to be a "good daughter" and just feeling round the edges of what that means at the moment.
I can't change myself into my sister, I won't marry the the man I meet who is prepared to take me on and squeeze out a couple of children so that I fit the "normal" daughter template [ETA - my sister didn't do this either!]. My parents would not want me to - they'd be happy if I was happy and although they would prefer a conventional life for me, they would never want me to pretend.
BUT
Along with other, more practical things I can sort out and will sort out, I know it would make them happy if I went to church. Of course the trouble is, I am an atheist. I really, really don't believe it - any of it. So that would make me a massive hypocrite, yes?
But then I think - well, as long as I don't do anything more than attend - and I certainly wouldn't take coommunion - then I'm just doing something for them. They don't really understand that I don't believe. They have never argued with me (or my brother) about not following the faith, because deep down they are sure they are right and we are communing with God in our own way, and will follow our own paths to him (pretty laid back for Catholics actually).
I think I will try Christmas Day and see how much of a worm it makes me feel.
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