[xoxoxoBruce]

Due to the credit crunch the local mine shut down and the dwarf had to get a new job.
Times were hard and the dwarf tried everywhere - finally he gets to the zoo.
"We've had a bad case of avian flu and all the penguins have died," said the zoo keeper.
"As they are our biggest attraction, I need you to dress up as a penguin and pretend to be one all day.
It pays $50 and all the fish you can eat."
Well that's not too bad, thinks the dwarf, so the next day he is their flapping about and swimming and eating fish.
"Not a great job, but hey, we've all had worse," he says to himself..

A few weeks later some local kids are visiting and decide to have some fun - by throwing a penguin into the Lion's den.
So they pick up the dwarf despite him flapping his little wings and chuck him over the fence.
He looks around and sees a huge lion approaching... its crawling up on him until he sees the whites of his eyes.
In panic the dwarf shrieks, "LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT, I'M NOT REALLY A PENGUIN - I AM A DWARF IN A PENGUIN SUIT!"

"Shut up or you'll get us both sacked!" says the lion.