Griff, I don't know if you are a nutter or not, but I wouldn't think so just because of this.
Personally I strongly believe in an afterlife for a number of reasons, not the least of which is that there has to be one if there is a God of love.
His love nature necessarily demands it.
Universal, ultimate justice is required of a God of love, and that doesn't occur here.
I see no logical way out of it.
But no, you aren't a nutter.