I knew it was going to be a weird day right from the start. We were driving to the complex for Lil Lookout's first game. He was unusually quiet until he asked how many games we had left. I told him I thought 4. He asked if he had to play in them. *gulp* He followed quickly with, "I want to move up to the next age group". He is still a year too young for that group but could probably hold his own, but I just asked him why. His answer was since the new kids moved up the games were boring. He can dribble and score on all of them and everytime we get players on our team that pass well together they make his friends go to another team because they score too much. He was very mature in the way he finished by saying, "I shouldn't have to worry about someone getting mad if I score a goal".
Holy crap. my just turned 7 year old is stressed out because he can't play soccer with his friends without some adult getting jealous and handicapping him or taking his teammates away.
I told him that we had to finish this session but we can be done after this.
My hope is/was that the feeling would pass and he'd relax.
The game was horrible. 3 of my 9 kids weren't there, so I borrowed a kid to stand in the goal. Lil Lookout scored a couple of nice goals right in the beginning but I could tell the joy wasn't there. He tried to pass to the new kid who upon looking at the ball, fell over. It just wasn't a fun game.
The turf needs to be stretched so kids were falling. One of the new refs started warning the kids about "sliding". I pointed out that they were just falling - they are 6 and 7 year olds playing on crummy turf, after all. His answer was that he thought they were doing it on purpose. I asked if he'd ever met a 6 year old before. He just glared at me. Ten minutes later one of my kids gave up a penalty. The ref warned us that it was number 3. (4 results in a PK shoot out). I reminded him that it was actually 2. He told me to be quiet that it was 3. I asked what the fouls were. He was correct about two of them, but the third was on the other team. No big deal he just counted it wrong, but he wanted to be a jerk about it. He came over and told me that it was three, I was wrong, and he knows how to count. I suggested that if that is the best he can count then he should get off the field. He started to get really pissed then, but the other coach stopped laughing long enough to explain that I was right. One of the fouls was against his team, "That's why you let his team take the kick remember?" Now he's steamed but has the count right.
Back to the game. A few minutes later their team is pushing up against our goal. Their kid shoots and hits my brand new, no nothing kid in the stomach. He instinctively catches the ball, then drops it. Hand ball, no question. My kids start to line up a wall but the ref announces it is a shootout, just the keeper and the shooter. I remind him that it is only the 3rd foul. He says it doesn't matter that it's a handball in the box, so it's a PK. I explain that he is using outdoor rules, while indoor club rules call for a different ruling. He ignores me. I tell him again. He turns around and tells me to shut up or he'll have me evicted from the building. I told him that was fine, as I was just trying to help him realize that EVERYONE watching the game was wondering WTF he was doing and that he just MIGHT be wrong. I told him to check with the other refs after the game since it is a pretty frequent occurrence with kids. He got pissed and shouted that he was going to evict me. I laughed and sent a parent to get S, the director/GM, my friend, his boss, over here to decide if I would be tossed or not. S came over, listened and reassured me and the ref that I would be there coaching as always, he informed the ref the call was wrong, but the point will stand because you don't overturn calls. Cool, I'm satisfied if annoyed.
The game ends and we lost by a point. That's ok, it's good to lose a game here and there. I was satisfied because I was hoping people would quit talking about my supposedly "stacked" team.
The other coach came over and asked me what all had happened. I told him. Another coach, who is a friend, listened in and laughed. I walked away thinking it was all over. S stormed over and pulled me into a locker room. He asked what I had been telling the two coaches. I explained once again that the coach had been giving attitude I didn't need when I pointed out the differences between indoor and outdoor play. He got in my face about "not needing his employees making a scene", "poisoning other employees", then he pointed out that my team was "like 38-1 don't make a scene because you lost". WTF? He knows me well enough that the record doesn't matter, it's about the fun. I reminded him of that, but he was still a little over the top. He walked away to leave me wondering what all the business about employees was about. Employees? Since when are we employees? I don't get paid. I'm a coach. I don't feel like dealing with the paperwork required to pay me, so I do it for free, just like the other two guys I was talking with. It was just kind of a shock that all of a sudden we're expected to act like cowering little employees. Whatever.
I was frustrated as I sat down on the bleachers but not overly worried. Then people started asking if I was going to keep coaching. Apparently, they'd heard S telling someone he didnt' need coaches who make waves. I assured them I'd still be there. Then B's dad asked if I was taking LL to tryout at a nearby club this week because of all the drama. "No, I have no plans to do that. Wait, what are you talking about?" Apparently the complex decided there was no room in the schedule for our club kids to play the next session. Oh boy.
I went to S and asked what was going on and he just said "i've been answering that all morning". I agreed he probably had, but people were coming to me, wanting advice on something I know nothing about. I don't like rumors and gossip, so I wanted the facts. Apparently the rec program has grown so much that there just isn't room for all the games we normally scheduled. (No additional teams have formed so I don't understand that reasoning) I looked at the timeblocks and noticed the only two age groups that didn't get time on Saturdays were U8 and U10, coincidentally the only two age groups the former President personally coaches. Although denials were adament, it is pretty clear they are just flipping off the former President. Fine, except that means 120 kids don't get to play soccer now. He insisted that wasn't true - he'd blocked out two hours on two nights during the week where those age groups could play. So that means that we could fit 4 teams per age group, while we currently have 6-8. EXCEPT that those times are directly across from the established and well known times that those same kids have club practices each week on outdoor fields.
He went on to point out he is the GM and he is going to make this business soar. The numbers are going to be awesome. Unlike anything we've imagine. OK, Captain Optimist - but remember that rule about "treat people like customers and they'll expect to be SERVED like customers"? He said a few other things that made it perfectly clear that anyone who didn't like it could leave because the business would be booming with new customers now that it is professionally run. He used subtle but clear language that the people that could leave were those of us who'd been there since the doors opened. Those of us who helped him move from out of state. Those that helped him through his divorce. Those that played on teams with him. Those that had welcomed him as one of us.
That was Saturday. I haven't answered my phone since then because I didn't want to deal with it. As of an hour ago I had received 74 voicemails and countless text messages asking what I was doing, where I was going, etc.
The soccer club is now exclusively an outdoor club. They just announced the teams for the 08/09 season two weeks ago. I am on the coaching staff. Lil Lookout is the centerpiece on the A team. The players I busted my butt to get in are all on the team with him. Some of the parents are nervous about all the drama. I coached their kids rec and am doing it in Club as well. A nearby club offered me the chance to form a team under their umbrella and run it as I see fit. The parents seem to think that is a great idea for stability issues. My own sense of loyalty tells me to stay right where I am while my weariness is pulling me towards quiet stability.
I will most likely be coaching for the club side as planned, right where I expected to be, with the kids I know.
The rec program though? I've got a feeling I'm going to be pushed out. That sucks. Another layer of suckiness is that is where I play as well. If they're trying to sweep out any memories of the people who started the place up, does that mean I'm not welcome to play there anymore as an adult, either? What sucks is that the complex isn't just a building or business, it is a community. We started up there with twenty 4,5, and 6 year olds, about the same 7 and 8's, and so on. Kids played on multiple teams to fill out the schedules. We adults did the same thing. I've personally started 5 different adult teams up there, moving on when each was strong enough to stand on it's own. Our core group all have 6-8 year olds who have been in that building 4-6 days each week for 4 years. We raised our kids in there.
I could not have predicted all this drama before this session began. And all this for a hobby. So much time, energy, and effort spent to build something that was more than just a game.
