[BrianR]

"Next Life"
by Woody Allen


In my next life I want to live my life backwards.
You start out dead and get
that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old
people's home feeling
better every day. You get kicked out for being too
healthy, go collect your
pension, and then when you start work, you get a
gold watch and a party on your
first day. You work for 40 years until you're young
enough to enjoy your
retirement. You party, drink alcohol, and are
generally promiscuous, then you are
ready for high school. You then go to primary
school, you become a kid, you
play. You have no responsibilities, you become a
baby until you are born. And
then you spend your last 9 months floating in
luxurious spa-like conditions
with central heating and room service on tap, larger
quarters every day and then
Voila! You finish off as an orgasm!

I rest my case.