[BigV]

I don't feel like a friend.
I feel like a parasite.

I feel like I"m STUCK in a role I HATE
I can't stop it.

the script, my script says: "break it"

:rips scriptbook into confetti:

aaaaarrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhh

why would I do that?!? why would I press and push and argue with and be fucking annoying until I did *indeed* break it, and I prove myself right!?!

yay farkin me!

NO

bad me.

don't do that.

don't.

just don't

stop being combative.

let people be nice to you.

you doofus.

looookkk I know you're hurt,

you are

with good reason.

I am sooo, sooo sorry buddy, but just .. chill out a minute.

just a minute.

listen to me.

look.

there's nice people all around.

really true.

*hold your tongue*

my turn

there's one.

let them be nice to you.

there's another! see?

ok?

calm down bro

it's ok.

You're worried about people's reactions. I know. I know.

I'm in the same head bro.

no secrets.

s'cool.

I'm cool.

it's their reaction

not yours

don't be a thief.

don't steal their stuff.

k?

they want to act nice, good.

they want to be unreasonable, cope.

you do right.

mind your own fuckin business.

be just and fear not.

Oh, and while we're at it.

you could lower your bar on a couple of these jumps a few notches.

that would be ok.

it'd be good.

less intimidating.

still well within acceptable limits.

and.

and on some, you could raise the bar.

yeah.

ok a lot to process, and all so vague.

sorry.

look.

here' I'll be specific.

lower this one.

Anybody can be mad at you if they want, as long as you're doing right.

your home training was superb, you paid attention and you're doing fine.

stick to it.

here's one you can raise.

take better care of yourself.

better eating.

better hygiene

better exercise.

all good for you.

less wallowing.

so.

one lower

one higher.

specific stuff for you.

bonus one.

look, be nice to the people around you. don't make them do all the work.

you have friends too.

remember what one said?

if your children came to you with the same problem, what would you tell them?

ok... welll.

if it's good dog food, you should eat it too!

be nice.

you want friends?

be a friend.

you want nice? be nice

you want funny, be funny

you want help , be helpful.

dude, you can so do this.

in your sleep.

but you have to do it

if it is to be it is up to me.

ok.

let's begin.

...

hey.

thanks man.

you're welcome.

we all gotta stick together in here.

one boat, right?

right.

.

.

/end of schizophrenic fugue

.

.

.

I have a loud head.