Quote:
Originally Posted by DanaC
I believe the better you treat people, the better they are likely to behave.
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Depends on your definitions. You appear to think that treating people 'better' means throwing money and assets at them that they haven't earned. This sort of 'treatment' without an expectation of commensurate responsibility only leads to people despising what they are given, and despising the givers.
A case in point: in Moosonee (on James Bay), where my husband and I practiced medicine when our oldest child was small, the government provided taxpayer-funded housing for both band status and non-status Indians. Fairly frequently the local band would complain to the government that the housing was in bad repair and needed to be replaced. It happens that my brother-in-law, who is a cabinet maker, was contracted to provide new kitchens and baths in the housing that the government built around that time. He was paid to put in very good quality cabinets - not base, cheap stuff; and he did. When he returned two weeks later to deliver a few more cabinets to one last house, he checked on the other houses to see if anything else was required. In the majority of brand-new houses there were holes in the walls, and cabinets had been ripped right off the walls. No one took care of the houses or fittings, because no one there had paid for them.
In this same community, when I made house calls, I would typically visit a house that had broken windows, holes in the walls, and dirt everywhere. But there was a big TV and satellite dish, new snow machines outside, and new trucks. The government-provided housing (exactly the same stuff as I lived in with my family) was trashed and the welfare checks had gone on the luxuries. The clinic was expected to provide the baby formula and medicines that people 'couldn't afford'.
I think that expecting integrity and responsibility from people is actually treating them 'better' than giving them endless handouts. That proved true in our practice, where we expected people to be on time (and we respected their time by also being on time - really!), and expected people to take responsibility in certain things. We developed an excellent relationship. If we had not asked anything of our practice, we would have received exactly what we had asked for.