[Sundae]

While I accept that people can lose their tempers and parenting is an incredibly hard job (and one I have chosen not to take up so far because of my personality) I don't think it was an appropriate message to leave on an 11 year old's phone.

Any parent that lowers themself to the level of the child will lose respect very quickly. Calling her a pig on an answerphone is not the same as losing it when she is standing in front of him and saying it in the heat of the moment. I only heard the message once, but I certainly thought the tone was threatening - when he said that he would be seeing her soon (a week I think) and they were going to have it out face to face. Then again I was listening to it from my personal point of view of a daughter - if my Daddy had ever left me a message like that it would have provoked a near-hysterical reaction on my part. Perhaps that's because my father was slow to anger and wasn't prone to over-reaction.

It does seem a shame that with all the effectively fatherless children out there, a man who probably loves his daughter very much is pushed beyond reason by not being allowed an open relationship with her. But I agree that he should get some help before being able to contact her again.