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There has to be a "why" to all of that.
My wife has several male friends, always has. They go to concerts and movies I find shitty, go to dinner and hang-out. Some of these guys are not my friends at all, just acquaintances. The idea that the time she is spending with them is "mine" or time can be owned is insane to me. I have had female friends and the situation is the same, if it were not I would leave her.
If someone is going to cheat, they are going to cheat, acting like a head-case is a sure-fire way to push them to it and find out quickly what if feels like to get cheated on or left.
What someone is thinking cannot be changed or altered and is such a paranoid thing to worry about that if one finds themselves fixated upon it, it is, seriously, time to get help.
Of course if someone sees someone attractive they are going to have lustful, primal, normal thoughts about that person... good, your SO is not dead or broken.
We point them out to each other all the time.
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