Sounds good Monster. I would, however, make one change on the third line. "You are all always with me.", I would remove the "all" or "always" because even reading it a couple times, it's a tongue twister and I'm assuming someone will be reading this at the service. The sentence remains virtually the same without one or the other.
I think it's a tasteful, respectful, farewell to what sounds like a great lady.
