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It was for the best. My son is three-&-1/2 and I told them to leave me. He knows that I am sick, but on days like that, he does not need to see me, just sucks it happened to be on Christmas. I had a couple of good hours in the morning, but I fucked-up and helped her put his kitchen together the night before, plus a front moved in that day and hammered me (the latter being 80% of it). A week of really bad times followed.
My wife is starting her own office with a new ins company and has less time with me. I am happy for her, but miss her a lot, especially since there are a lot of things I can't do for myself any more, some that I have not told her about. I am not eating much some days. My last tests came back very dehydrated and my family freaked... my fault for not speaking-up but she has so much to do...
I just had a surgical procedure yesterday and I have to spend all day in the hospital, perhaps two on Fri, with only a small meal before 9am and nothing but clear liquids until 11am (nothing after that) for extensive tests. They are going to hurt like something that many/perhaps most of you will never know, thank goodness.
You never know if they are for me or for them to write some damn paper or just for their curiosity.
I'm probably going to have to have these stones cut out, which is very scary with my immune system... keep in mind, my wrist has been broken/or a torn ligament/tendon, they don't really know since October. I suck at healing.
Finally, my pain level is through the roof and it affects everything... I have not been able to hang-out with any of my friends for ages. I spend all my time alone in this bed in more pain every day.
Good times.
One cool thing, my son is awesome, every day is a gift that I get to see him for just a few moments. It is all that keeps me alive.
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