[j03L10T]

1. Seeing the naked body of a woman in a national lampoon magazine at age five.

2. Being majorly clawed by very large dogs the same year while scooting down the sidewalk on my "big wheel".

3. Watching a re-enactment of the crucifiction inside of a church (I would have sworn those nails were real).

4. The following Christmas I discovered that the baby jesus was actually a flashlight inside of basket and it lived in the church only during Christmas.

5. Asthma attacks, and recovering already thinking I had suffered enough to stay home from school the next day but it rarely worked out that way.

Those first five were before moving to L.A.-

6. Playing doctor at the local playground and getting caught. I'm still not understanding what was so wrong with "show me your's & I'll show you mine".

7. Trying to take appropriate credit for the vocals of surfacing and soon to be heavily established rock and rap and punk and country and jazz and blues groups (I may have forgotten to include something).

8. Becomming an alcoholic before completing fifth grade, and flunking the sixth. The beer and smokes were furnished while I continued to supply the vocal tracks for different groups.

9. Getting pistol whipped while buying pot off of the street. Money and car keys stolen and one hell of a concussion. They finally caught the guy a couple of years ago, kidnapped a taxi driver. It was his 49th appearance in court for the same type of felony, and for some odd reason they finally decided to lock him up for good.

10. Getting together with some guys and inventing the concept of a forum to be called the cellar, which I did find on my own without any help whatsoever save only the memory of having done so.

(#10 is actually an event that took place back in 1980, I was only twelve at the time- it as a lot to remember)

Also- Chronologicly spreaking, to be more precise #10 belongs between #8 and #9. Sorry that I'm too tired right now to even cut/copy/paste. Still recovering from all of the business we did during the last few days of our Christmas season. Cheers!!