My fav is giving them the number of the local suicide prevention hotline. Works like a charm.
When I broke up with my ex, I paged him and put in the number of the county jail, the rape crisis hotline, the local center for prevention of domestic violence, the DA's financial crimes division, two of his ex girl friends, AND his ex wife, and the the AID's crisis line. Petty stuff, but it amused me at the time.
