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Originally Posted by Clodfobble
Oh, pretty darn rarely, I would guess. Like you said, most people getting divorced can't agree on anything. Even if they start the process with the best intentions, a lot of people can be convinced by friends and lawyers that they're being taken advantage of or need to get nasty to get "what they deserve". Anecdotally, I think perth and case had a mutually-agreed on situation set up for their son, with very little court involvement. It's really the best way to go about it, but not a lot of people can pull it off. Most women aren't capable of freely letting their ex care for the children for any amount of time, even when they openly admit he's a perfectly good parent.
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My ex was perfectly fine with me raising our kid (who was 11 and in physical rehab from his brain injury when she left me). She knew he was going to be a lot of work, and she was pretty focused on herself, her boyfriend and getting as far away from our life together as possible. I mean, she came around a couple of times a week and demanded that I do thus and such for him, yadda yadda, but I'd just smile and nod, then go ahead and do what I knew was the right thing to do anyway. Every time it came down to push or be shoved, she'd back off, because she really couldn't be bothered in the end to *do* anything. Once I finally figured out that she wasn't actually going to go through the efforts to force me to do anything any other way than the way which I thought was right, life got a lot easier.
I'm sure I had a luxury that most people don't in such cases, though, and I don't envy anyone who has to do that battle.