[Aliantha]

I don't think I ever really got embarrassed about anything my Mum did. She used to drive a very unsightly car which is difficult to explain and probably best described as 'a toolshed on wheels'. My father had converted a long wheel based landcruiser into a sort of campervan. This was the car of my childhood. It actually was quite legendary at both the primary and high schools that I went to along with my brother.

The embarrassing story I have is actually my brothers, but i think it deserves telling here.

My mum (who was a two pot screamer) had been at her squash club christmas party when she recieved a call saying that my brother had broken his leg and could she please come down to the school. I didn't actually see the next bit, but this is how my brother tells it.

He was lying on the oval with a mask on his face feeling ok - thanks to the drugs - even though he'd broken both bones just above his ankle when they all heard another vehicle heading towards them! As they turned, they saw to their surprise, shock and amazement that my mother had driven the toolshed through the school and down onto the oval and parked it right next to the ambulance. I'm sure she violated several rules of the road, not the least of which was being under the influence of alcohol while driving.

My brother was loaded into the ambulance shortly after everyone regained their composure after this momentous event and Mum was asked to follow to the hospital in her car - slowly! On the way to the hospital she had to stop off and pick me and my b/f up from home and then continue on to the hospital. After a breakneck ride, we arrived at the hospital and there was no sign of the ambulance. Mum assumed that they'd already dropped my brother off and left. This was not the case. She actually beat the ambulance there!

A brief description of my mother. She was 5 foot nothing and quite slight in build. She was fairly observant of her catholic faith and rarely had a drink except at special occasions (like the xmas party). She was quiet and softly spoken.

On the day of my brothers accident, I thought she had been possessed!

So the ambulance arrived and my brother was all smiles when he got out - till the gas wore off. Mum continued to panick for the next 8 weeks or so till his leg was healed, but the story goes down in history, and was in fact a part of the eulogy my brother gave at her funeral just over 2 years ago.