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confusion increasing... frustration mounting...
i am now fairly certain that i'm not grasping at straws to soften the blow to my ego. i can accept that my wife might stop loving me without being crazy.
i cannot accept that her recent behavior is natural/normal/not evidence of mental distress. 2 of her very good friends had their birthday last night, so all of the girls have been planning (for weeks) on going out to celebrate tonight. i drove my wife to the restaurant that they were going to be launching their festivities from.
i should back up to say that last night we had a great night, this morning i was an alien for saying that i loved her. i got home from work today and everything was golden. she was happy and somewhat relaxed. in fact we ended up having a fairly vigorous romp. 45 minutes later she couldn't stand to have me in the same room. anyway...
we are driving to the restaurant and she is seriously on edge. smiling one minute and the next sullen. at times i could see her visibly getting wound up like a top. i missed the turn for the restaurant, delaying her arrival by about 3 minutes. you would have thought i stabbed her mother at a family event. unglued, seriously pissed to the point that she just glared at me as she got out of the vehicle and never looked back.
my sister is there with all the girls and she is aware of the situation(my only secret from my wife is that my sister knows), so she has promised to try to keep an eye on her mental state during the night.
my expectation is that she won't be home before the bars close, cross-eyed, mean drunk. spoiling for a fight. just a guess.
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