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discipline, i think is a fine line to walk. on one hand, there has to be *some* punishment. on the other, there has to be guidance. im not really in a place yet where discipline is a huge issue. james basically knows what the word 'no' means. it means that immediately after i say it, i will come pick him up and move him away from whatever it was he wasnt supposed to play with. so when theyre young, you probably want to stick to guidance. it wouldnt be effective for me to spank him or put him in the corner or send him to his room. he wouldnt understand why i did it, and in the last two cases, he probably wouldnt care.
but wait until he learns that he can say no too. when i tell him its bedtime and he looks defiantly at me and refuses, then some punishment is in order. i dont really know what, but repeating the instructions and letting him tell me no over and over again is not an effective way of teaching him. i dont honestly know if spanking is the answer, but i do know that grounding a 2 year old is a waste of time.
positive reinforcement is good. when he cleans his room without arguing, i will always thank him and make sure he knows i appreciate it. and once in a whilehe might get ice cream or a new toy. but i know parents who go overboard. it becomes a kind of bribery. 'clean your room and ill take you to toys r us.' pretty soon, the kid wont clean his room unless he gets something in return.
damn, discipline is such a grey area. as i type this, i realize that i really have no plan for how to discipline my son as he gets older. i hate to wing it, but i really have no idea how best to punish him when he gets older. as a child, my wife was punished by spanking, or even the mere threat of spanking. her brother, on the other hand, couldnt care less. he laughed when spanked. different children call for different methods. god, i wish there was a science to this.
how about i condense the above to this: i have a lot of ideas. but frankly, i have no fucking clue how to discipline a child.
~james
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