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Originally Posted by Beestie
My first tip... type CTL+A then CTL+C every so often...
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Noted, thanks.
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Originally Posted by Beestie
I think its the "stimulate" part that's giving you trouble. It really sounds like you are "stimulated" by overcoming rejection (or a lack of complete acceptance) from people you are attracted to. Once they accept you, the stimulation is over and the boredom begins.
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Not true, I don't think. The simple truth is I want a guy that's not interested, and I grew out of a guy who was. I don't think I have any deep-seated stimulation issues... but I will think about this.
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Originally Posted by Beestie
One other thing to think about. You said that you were "perfect" for him. Well, that guy that loved you without condition was "perfect" for you.
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He wasn't - we couldn't talk. He didn't understand me, so I couldn't understand how he could love 'everything about me'. He didn't
know everything about me. This is where the current guy comes closer - he knows a LOT more, nearly everything. I think that's it, actually. I want someone to 'know' me, all of me, to understand. I think I'm asking something quite impossible.
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Originally Posted by OC
You are in love with him. Why do you have such a hard time accepting this basic fact? Love is what it is, and it's different for every single person, and you will not love every person the same way. If you aren't happy with what you're getting from him, get it somewhere else.
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I don't know if I'm in love with him. I thought you were supposed to 'just know' if you're in love. And he's not interchangeable, like a brand name. I can't just switch from Coke to Pepsi because Coke gives me wind. Ah you know what I mean. I can only get what I want from HIM. Which is very unfortunate for me.
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Originally Posted by clodfobble
Hell, tell this guy that since he knows you so well, and understands your need for a more involved relationship, could he perhaps introduce you to anyone he thinks might be right for you? It might be just what he's hoping to hear.
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Mmm. Not a bad idea. But I know he doesn't know anyone.... might say something like that to help take some pressure off him though, if that's what he's feeling. I'd feel a bit fake mind. Anyway, I'm not looking for "a relationship". I'm hoping for a deeper relationship with
him.
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Originally Posted by Elspode
Seems like there's always an imbalance somewhere.
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Yes, why is that? Do you think we just settle, because we think real love is too improbable? So, for example, I'm settling for him even though he's not giving me everything I need, and he's settling for me even though he's 'just not that interested'?
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Originally Posted by jinx
Sounds like you guys make a terrific set of best friends though
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Yes, I think that's probably what it amounts to. Don't know why I take it as an insult, friends will probably last much longer than a relationship anyway. But there's not the intensity or passion that drives me. But I do keep forgetting intensity and passion is short lived. I think I'm chasing that elusive 'high' and thinking I can sustain it, which of course is bollocks.
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Originally Posted by mrnoodle
You'll eventually grow out of needing to be amused (not patronizing you, it's just a fact) and start feeling the need to give more than you receive. Ask anyone how they felt when their first child was born. That kind of feeling will be the one that signals "twoo wuv".
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That's how I felt with my 'first love'. I knew then, too; I
knew I loved him. Wonder what went wrong there.