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This was rumored to be on rec.humor.funny ...
In article <S11fc.59c3@netfunny.com>,
King Ables <king.ables@alumni.utexas.net> wrote:
> With apologies to Don McLean...
>
> A long, long time ago
> I can still remember how computing
> used to be worthwhile.
>
> And I knew from the day I was born
> that I could make that code perform
> and maybe I could do it with some style.
>
> But last September made me shudder,
> with every 'nouncement Carly uttered.
>
> Bad news in my In-tray,
> I couldn't take one more day.
>
> I can't remember if I sighed when I
> read about our latest stride,
> something cut me deep inside,
> the day the HPWay died.
>
> So
>
> <Chorus>
>
> Purge, purge, Ms. Technology Scourge,
> Drove my Beetle to the Needle,
> Now my job's on the verge.
>
> Them Compaq boys were
> drinking Starbuck's and Surge
> singing "This'll be the day that we merge,
> This'll be the day that we merge."
>
>
> Did you write the Book of DOS
> And do you believe an albatross
> Can really save our company?
> Now do you believe in buying time?
> Can Compaq save our bottom line?
> And can you teach me how write a resume?
>
> Well, I know you hatched that plot with him
> 'Cause I saw you climb out on that limb.
> You both threw down your stock
> 'Cause you thought this deal was a lock.
>
> I was a middle-aged computer geek
> With a second mortgage that I closed last week
> But I knew Sun was worth a peek
> The day the HPWay died.
>
> I started singing
>
> <Chorus>
>
> Now for some time we've been on our own
> Since Bill and Dave left us alone
> But it's not how it used to be.
> When the managers still walked around
> And talked to people who touched the ground
> They could hear ideas from you and me.
>
> But now when the Queen is looking down
> The worker bees just fly around
> The boardroom is reserved
> No progress is observed.
> And while Carly read a book on Dell
> The stock price slowly went to hell
> And we tried so hard not to sell
> The day the HPWay died.
>
> We were singing
>
> <Chorus>
>
> Arbitrage, arbitrage in the garage
> Employees fleeing from the barrage
> Of all the spin on HPNow.
> Green cards, white cards flying around,
> Shareholders want good reasons found
> With employees on the sidelines tied and bound.
>
> Now the meeting air was full of gloom
> While the board played their tired old tune.
> We all got up to vote
> Oh, but they said we rocked the boat.
> Then when Walter tried to make his speech,
> Carly told him to "just go teach"
> Do the by-laws allow impeach?
> The day the HPWay died.
>
> <Chorus>
>
> They say we were in a shipwreck
> A generation mired in Tech
> Lethargic and pedestrian.
> So come on everybody let's just grow
> We'll be as big as IBM you know
> 'Cause size is the CEO's great plan.
>
> Oh, and as they watched her on the stage,
> They all began to see a sage
> Everyone in The Flint
> Was finally taking the hint.
> And as the white cards flew into her sight
> The crowd could finally "see the light"
> I saw Carly smiling with delight
> The day the HPWay died.
>
> I was singing
>
> <Chorus>
>
> I met a girl who looked amused
> And I asked her what PC she used
> She just smiled and said "Gateway."
> I went down to the comp'ny store
> Where I'd bought HP shirts years before
> But the man there said he's out of "HP Way."
>
> And in our cubes we reminisced
> Of ways of business that were dissed
> But not a word was spoken
> All of our hearts were broken.
> And the two men I admired best
> Bill and Dave were not at rest
> The new guys did not pass the test
> The day the HPWay died.
>
> <Chorus>
>
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