[lumberjim]

i had this customer named Earl S. He was an old miserable fuck. 75 yrs old, and tighter than the pope's ass. he argued about every simple detail of the deal, changed his address on the paperwork with my assistant on my day off, disregarded what i told him about getting his tags, blah blah blah. in short, i wanted to hit him. and i didnt care that he was 75 and it would probably kill him if i did.

Needless to say, he declined the service contract i offered him that came with roadside assistance. so yesterday, i get a call....while i'm upstairs eating lunch. normally, i ignore pages for phone calls when im eating, as there is no phone upstairs, and you have to traipse all the way down to service to get the call. however, this time the salesmanger was paging me in an urgent tone, and by the third time, i figured i would go get the call. guess who.

"Uh, yeah, hi, jim. listen, i have a little problem..."
"Oh really, Earl?"
Yeah,.....seems I locked my keys in my car......and I can't find the roadside assistance information in my paperwork..."
" you don't have roadside assistance, Earl. Remember, you said it was cheaper for you to get AAA."
"Oh, .......right......well, what can you do for me?"
"What can I do for you?"
"Yeah, I just got the car last week. ...."
"Well, earl, if you HAD gotten the service contract, you could call raodside assistance, and they'd get them out for you, but since you didn't, I guess you'll have to call a locksmith or something"
long pause
"You still there, Earl?"
"Uh ,yeah, Jim.......well, can you recommend a good locksmith?"
"No, Earl. I can't. good luck. have a nice day."

CUH-LICK!