Ok, so I'm just walking out of my apartment to the university. I have to walk about 300m down this big road, two lanes going in each direction. This road has a grass divider in the middle about 10ft wide.
I'm walking, and this is like 8PM and it's dusk. I've had 2 beers, and I'm off to the library to study. (I'm actually serious. It's sad.) Of course, 2 beers, six foot one and 190 lbs, I'm about as far from drunk as I am from Mongolian.
I'm walking, and I'm wearing khakis and a light tee shirt. About as normal clothing as you can imagine. Some meathead in a truck on the OTHER side of the road (past the grass divider) rolls down his window and yells "SLIT YOUR WRISTS AND SHOW YOUR GOD WHO'S BOSS"
Now, this is by far the strangest heckle I have ever heard. I mean, who the fuck yells that? So I flip him the double-bird and say "fuck off" just loud enough for him to hear it. The dude pushes his girth out of the window, his whole torso, and screams "FUCK YOU, YOU FUCK!"
My first thought was, that's a pallindrome.
So I keep walking, and I see him pull this insane u-turn at the intersection behind me. I'm thinking, he wants to fight. I'm totally up for fighting to defend the honour of my love, or something, but this is stupid. And, I've had two beers. If I get busted for a public altercation, I'll have alcohol added to the charge. So I do what any normal human being would do, while thinking calmly, under stress.
I tear-ass across campus and hide in the basement of the Psychology building.
Seemed fitting.
And that is my brush with the concept of having balls.
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