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The message of the #MeToo movement was "sexual abuse and workplace harassment will not longer go unreported." Saying it's about general "respect" is a serious dilution/broadening of that which is not good for the movement.
Ansari is a self-described feminist man, celebrates the #MeToo movement and is considered woke. He probably believed he was respecting her. He texted her the next day (unprovoked - hurr durrr neanderthal man would not text or call, and that would be seen as a sign of... disrespect) and he was surprised to find it didn't go well.
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