Things not to say when asking for a date
 

As you don't know, Lin has been transferred to Nashville, and I'm all alone in this big ol' town.

I called a woman I met a few nights ago at my local hang.

Let's call her 'Marie'. At various points thru this conversation I said:

NBN: "I'm sorry, I haven't asked for a date in over ten years"
(Mind you this was after she told me she hadn't dated in a long time.)

NBN: "I took some really good pictures of you and your friend. What was her name?"

NBN: "I had to get a little drunk to call you." (Never good even if you've known her for years.)

Best (or worst) for last:

Five minutes into our conversation I said this:

NBN: "I remember talking about your tattoo..." (She has one plainly visible on her breast in my photo of her, and I recall her saying the night we met that 'Laser is expensive')
"Have you ever considered having someone try to suck it off?"
Marie: "WHAAAAT???"

I'm surprised she kept speaking to me after that.

Next time I'll record any such exchanges. You would laugh your asses off, and maybe I'll get that Internet 15-minutes of fame I so desperately seek.

So you're single? I had the impression NBN was a married man.

He didn't say he was single. He just said he was trying to get a date.:D

Re: Things not to say when asking for a date
 

You know, I just flashed back to Mel Brook's "Silent Movie", with Marty Feldman making indecent proposals to every woman in the movie until one finally said yes.

You were just playing the odds. Think of what would have happened if she had said yes.

I had a roomate in school that would ask 3 questions.
Do you like peanut butter?
Ever been to Alaska by MTA?( Boston Subway)
Wanna Fuck?
75% would freak out and walk away. Another 20% would slap him or dump a drink on him. But, 5% would laugh and relent.
5% was a hell of a lot better than most of us were doing. ;)