What the hell
 

I am drinking a beer, very slowly, and in between drinks I put a quarter on top to keep fruit flies/whatever out. Every damn time I pick it up, I forget the fucking quarter and it flies off and hits me in the chest. EVERY DAMN TIME.

Grab it with your prehensile cock. ;)

Why, is Tiki an echidna?

Yes.

LOL! You totally can't handle your drink................;) Here let me handle that for you..........

try a red quarter?

Make a hinge out of scotch tape.;)

Why is Tiki an echidna?

Long story Limey...

Hmmmm, chat story it sounds like.
Said resentfully.
Hmmmmpf.

My parents have coasters that they don't want damaged. WTF? They're COASTERS! Designed to have drinks on them! Frame them and hang them on the wall if they're that precious.

Anyway. This means you have to have disposable coasters (little papery cocktail things) on top of the coasters. Cold drinks sweat, so every time you lift them up the damned papery thing comes with it, and drifts gently down onto your lap. Hot drinks seem to create a vacuum, so every time you lift them up the... you get the picture.

My parents are house-sitting for 9 days at the end of the month. I'm going to have a non-coaster jamboree.

Tiki? If flies are really such a big deal, I'd consider moving. I am. Considering I mean.

Thats called a bev-meter - Make a game of it and see how far you can get it to stay with the can or go for maximum distance.

I hate coasters...they don't absorb anything. My solution? Never let a beverage sit long enough to develop condensation.

Tiki: put a shot glass upside down over your beer...it's an old bar trick we used to keep fruit flies out of the liquor bottles at night. Those flies love them some tequila, and whiskey.

Good idea! Thanks!

I seem to be having a retarded week all around... stress must be making me grind my teeth at night, and I think my jaw is already sensitive from a bad dental experience last week, because my TMJ is flaring up so badly it hurts to eat soup.

Ah well.

At least if this goes on for very long I'll lose a few pounds...