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-   -   6/14/2004: Rasputin's penis (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=6077)

Undertoad 06-14-2004 11:39 AM

6/14/2004: Rasputin's penis
 
http://cellar.org/2004/rasputinpenis1.jpg

A Russian erotica museum is claiming this is the package of Rasputin, the hard-to-kill Russian gent who finally got offed in 1916. Its authenticity is unclear.

full story

glatt 06-14-2004 11:42 AM

first thought: eww
Second thought: Oh, my God. It's huge.
Third thought: What the hell is she doing with her face pressed so close?

lumberjim 06-14-2004 12:02 PM

first thought: eww
second thought: eww
third thought: eww


in other words, eww.

Elspode 06-14-2004 01:19 PM

Are pretty sure this isn't a whale penis?

YellowBolt 06-14-2004 01:24 PM

More about his death...

"That guy ****ing scares me. It breifly talks about his death. But these two nobles hated that dude because he had control when the Tsar was off fighting World War I.

Two nobles put sianide in his wine, and all he did was get drunk. They shot him in the head. He fell. They went in the next room to discuss the disposal of his body. When they came back, he was crawling out the door bleeding from the head. They shot him again, he fell, but got up, and ran out the door into the street where they shot him in theh ead, and took a knife to his throat for security. They disposed of the body by throwing it in the river.


A week passed and they found his body, did an Autopsy, and found out that they didn't kill him with their bullets or knives.

He drowned to death."

Freaky.

modernhamlet 06-14-2004 02:18 PM

1 Attachment(s)
I'm going to pretend the left side of that pic doesn't exist.

lalalalalalalala....

Must look at beautiful Russian girl.......

hampor 06-14-2004 02:44 PM

shrinkage
 
The yahoo story gives Rasputin credit for 11 inches.

And that's after being thrown in a frozen river.


Judging by the picture, they sure did include a bunch of abdomen in that jar, so maybe they're measuring from the back of the prostate.

xoxoxoBruce 06-14-2004 02:56 PM

Quote:

In a more innocent age, it was said that Gregory Efimovich Rasputin's legendary power over women was due to his piercing eyes.
I guess when they looked down to avoid his piercing eyes, they checked out the codpiece.;)

jaguar 06-14-2004 03:49 PM

Quote:

Only part of Knyazkin's collection of 12,000 erotic objects is displayed in the clinic, which is staffed by buxom nurses wearing short white blouses and high heels.
You know this place has front for a house of ill repute written all over it.

wolf 06-14-2004 08:17 PM

Will they be selling replicas in the gift shop?

richlevy 06-14-2004 08:24 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by wolf
Will they be selling replicas in the gift shop?
You know, having seen how they can turn live penises into sex toys, it would be possible to have a historical dildo collection. You could start with Dillinger and Rasputin.

With 3-D modelling software and access to J. Edgar Hoover's sex surveillance picture collection you might even be able to reconstruct other famous members.

Of course each would come with a tasteful certificate of authentic reproduction.

You know, if I'd have thought of this in time, I could have saved the Franklin Mint from closing. It sure beats collectible thimbles.:cool:

wolf 06-14-2004 08:39 PM

You might want to try Lenox Collectables ... they're still in business. Hamilton Collection too ... One of them should jump at it. It represents an untapped market.

Beats the shit out of those mournful looking dolls ...

elSicomoro 06-14-2004 08:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by richlevy
You know, having seen how they can turn live penises into sex toys, it would be possible to have a historical dildo collection. You could start with Dillinger and Rasputin.
There's a woman that already does that with the penises of rock stars.

jdbutler 06-15-2004 07:25 AM

Anybody wanna build a Chia-twat?

jdbutler 06-15-2004 09:56 AM

Pfizer Corp. announced today that VIAGRA will soon be available in liquid form and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one!

Obviously we can no longer call this a "soft drink" and it gives new meaning to the names of "cocktails", "highballs", and just a good old fashioned "stiff drink". Pepsi will market the new
"concoction" by the name of "Mount & Do".
:rolleyes:


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