The Cellar - Just letting you know

My situation has become very difficult and I am now officially separated from my husband. I'm am posting as anonymous in the hopes that he wont bother reading here and I can talk to you guys about things and not have him use it against me at a later date.

I asked him to move into a different room last Sunday after discovering stuff on his computer which shocked but didn't surprise me if that makes any sense. He hasn't been having an affair (that I know of). it was something else, but equally detrimental to the tenuous state of our marriage.

Anyway, today I started making official arrangements for the kids and me. At this stage we will stay put because three of the four of them have schools they need to attend in the area. Even if we do move, it wont be far.

He said yesterday he wasn't sure if he wanted to separate, but I am tired of him being the one to call the shots, so as far as I'm concerned, we are no longer a couple. Whether or not things follow through to the likely conclusion, only time will tell. He says he's talking to a psychologist as well as a psychiatrist to try and sort out his issues, but he's been at it for 6 months and so far nothing has changed. if anything, things are worse (obviously).

I know I own part of the blame for this failure, largely that I have just turned off my emotions as far as he's concerned. I just don't give a shit what he does anymore. He could walk out the door and never come back and I really don't think I'd care except for the effect it would have on the kids. Six months ago, I didn't think we could afford to separate. Obviously things are worse, because now I'm finding ways to make it affordable.

So now you're up to date. I may decide to get a new name on here, but who knows. If any of you want to chat, you can find me on facebook or send me a PM.