Inoffensive one-word euphemisms for "idiot" please...
 

Also preferably avoiding any more that end with "head"... but they do need to be reasonably universal and well-understood. :D I don't ask much, do I?

So far I have:

twit
dolt
dope
twerp
numpty
doofus
airhead
numbskull
birdbrain
blockhead
dunderhead

...so things in that vein. Please and thank you :)

dingbat (*)

1.NORTH AMERICAN•AUSTRALIAN/NZ
a stupid or eccentric person.

2.a typographical device other than a letter or numeral (such as an asterisk), used to signal divisions in text or to replace letters in a euphemistically presented vulgar word.

Dummy
Bumpkin

liking... thanks both :)

ooh...
peabrain
halfwit

and the other half... nitwit.

Nincompoop

dipstick
dimwit

plonker!

there's also berk which is generally used in an inoffensive manner but does have a crude origin......

pillock
...and also clod.... (sorry, Ms. Fobs)

wally and prat

bimbo and himbo

ETA: "dummkopf" was a Germanism in the English language for a long time; but, not so much recently.
.
.

bimbo and himbo bring a gender element that could be considered offensive. Think words you wouldn't worry about calling your partner or kids if they fucked up level of inoffensive

Turkey.

Sleeve! hi!


It's only been 5.5 years, apparently! Hope all is as well as can be expected... ;)

Then you can't have dipstick 'cause that would be callin' someone a dick in Washington state. :p: