1/23/2003: Thailand's Miss Drunk
 

http://cellar.org/2003/missdrunk.jpg

Arthur Dent: What's so unplesant about being drunk?
Ford Prefect: Ask a glass of water!

What you see there is Thailand's Miss Drunk competition, which is meant to promote Thai wines.

The winner was one Arunothai Sriaran. To win she had to drink approximately half a liter of the stuff and then make it through the shown obstacle course of bottles.

Thai senators were not amused, and called the event a disgrace to the dignity of Thai women. (Uhhhh... isn't Thailand one of the prostitution capitals of the world?)

so what's the next shot ...

I remember hearing stories about the skills of thai women, such that they could, with an orifice not designed for such things, in addition to, um ... "playing" with the bottle sans hands could remove the contents solely by the power of the muscles of said orifice and return it to a wineglass ...

Of course, that could just be a story.

But There's More!
 

Also, extinguish candles and "smoke" cigarettes (inhale and exhale -- take that, Bill Clinton) using said orifices, according to a friend who swears he saw this first-hand!

I've also heard about the bananas and the ping-pong balls.

I've also heard about the bananas and the ping-pong balls.

As long as it's not that they can <i>peel</i> bananas...uh...like that.

I, too, have personally witnessed the ping-pong ball feat. Please don't ask me why; I have a rather embarassing personal history of which I'm not particularly proud (sobriety is my friend).

I will say that rather impressive distances can be achieved by a highly skilled practitioner of such ball-istic endeavors. ;-)

I would say it's probably true. Henry Rollins, one of the least-full-of-crap guys I've ever seen, claims to have seen one live on one of his spoken word albums.

I can't seem to remember which one, but he told the tale of a sex show he went to in Thailand where the "performer" shot a banana clear across a room with her coochie. (That's the kind of muscular control that scares a guy. :))

Great story, and well told.

Even though I really don't like his music, I love his spoken word stuff. It's not quite comedy, but is often damn funny.

Gotta love Prince.

I don't know if that was on Henry's album, but the description is in Spaulding Gray's monologue Swimmng to Cambodia.