May 26, 2010: The Hanging Coffins of Sagada
 

http://cellar.org/2010/hangingcoffins1.jpg

In Sagada, Philippines, they have a funeral tradition dating back 2000 years.

When you get old, you build your own coffin. What a treat! Typically by hollowing out a log. It should be rather small, because it's going to have to be hauled up a cliff. Your family can help in the coffin-building process, which must really be a treat: hey kids, grampa's about to snuff it so get handy with the tools already.

http://cellar.org/2010/hangingcoffins2.jpg

And then once you die, you're packed into the thing - they can break your bones up if you're too big for the box - and you're hauled up the cliffside.

Now, if you're lucky you get a spot hanging on the outside of the cliff.

http://cellar.org/2010/hangingcoffins3.jpg

But you may just end of stacked on one of the caves that line the cliff.

http://cellar.org/2010/hangingcoffins4.jpg

Either way, what a final resting spot. The idea is to get you closer to heaven so the trip is shorter.

I guess, but if your soul can make the ionosphere, the last 500 yards aren't really that much of an extra haul.

debri.ru wikipedia

A tomb with a view.

What if you refuse to build your coffin? What are they gonna do? Take your funeral away?

Then they bury you down at the bottom of the canyon, and it's that much harder for you to get up to heaven.

The floor of the canyon is riddled with the bodies of the decoffinated.

Brilliant. :D

I laugh, but this is a legitimate response according to their own logic...

Did heaven exist 2000 years ago, when they started doing this?

Yes. The official IPO of heaven was on March 27th -45,678.

One could argue that being old combined with the physical stress that would come with building your own coffin could hasten the need for said coffin.

Make it fun...when the grandkids misbehave, they get to spend 30 minutes hollowing out grandma/grandpa's coffin.

The punishment for not building your coffin is being kicked off the top of the cliff before your time is up.
The question is, what happens to accident victims or those who die young hanging coffins?

"Better get crackin' on that coffin, son. It ain't gonna build itself." could also be a variation on "See that yard? That's my yard. See that grass all over my yard? That's your grass. I want you to get your grass off my yard right now, boy."
"See that tree? That's my tree, I want you to get your coffin out of my tree..."