The Cellar - Eulogy

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Thank you infinite monkey. :)

My heart is broken for you V :'(

Quote:

Originally Posted by BigV (Post 918392)

I like that poem, Gravdigr. I'd come to your funeral. I'd say goodbye to you as you left the bar, too.

xoB, your point is well made. I agree with it. But for those "social mastubators / networkers", fuck'em. I'm not talking to them, not directly. Those would be the people I don't know. No reason to snub them directly, but I doubt we'll connect much, and I certainly have no inclination to seek out anyone there that I don't already know.

But there will definitely be people there, the living people, who I'll be grieving with. Those are the ones who have my respect that I intend to show. You're right on target about saying goodbye to the dead, too. And I will, also being aware that I'll be watched by my children. Her sisters and her dad and his wife will be there of course. Probably lots of relations more removed from her immediate family and from my attention. From my side if the family, I expect the only other person who might attend would be my mother, and she's a maybe due to her mobility restrictions.

I don't really know who's in charge of the final arrangements, I suspect it's BD. I'll contact her later, probably tonight, and talk to her about it.

Maybe pictures? A slide show? I just don't know. Music? These are the kinds of questions Tink would be, or IMHO, *should* be dealing with. **shrug** I just don't know.

We did a slide show of my dad with pictures from his childhood to most recent with the soundtrack from one of his favorite TV series, Pennies From Heaven, as background.

Everyone ended up gathering in front of the screen and trading stories and memories, it was actually fairly uplifting for people to see a lot of photos of him smiling and enjoying life. It took a lot of the downer out of the event and focused on the man and his life rather than on his passing.

They did a slideshow at my ex father-in-law's visitation too. It was really nice. I was in 3 shots. The last thing he said to me when he was still aware of his surroundings (at the visitation of a good friend, my ex's best friend) was that I was always like another daughter to him. We got along so well.

Anyway we did picture collages for mom. She had prepared a cd with songs she wanted on it. Wish we'd done a slide show.

My FIL was old school. His funeral is the day after tomorrow, and I made up two big old school foam boards of picture collages. I'm really happy with how they came out. I always thought we didn't have any pictures of him, but once I started digging through our stuff, and then asking around, I got a lot of material. Scanned it all and made prints. His whole life, from baby pics all the way up to a month before he died.

Slide shows are good too, but you always get the one oblivious cousin who stands in front of the projector and blocks projected images from reaching the screen. And what are you going to do, interrupt the conversation he's having with Aunt Alice and ask him to GTFO?

Quote:

Originally Posted by glatt (Post 918473)

My dad's family is Irish. They'd be vocal and then brawl if need be.

Anyone ever attend a funeral with an open bar?

Some open bar weddings I've attended have effectively been funerals...

All I can say is HUGS BV. I'm so sorry for all concerned.

Have you contacted your local ALS org. chapter? They can be a huge help.
Before I worked for Make-A-Wish in AZ, I worked for another org. that shared offices with the local AZ chapter of ALS. They can help with a lot of equipment needs, cost savings, etc.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gravdigr (Post 918491)

Anyone ever attend a funeral without an open bar?

again the Irish

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gravdigr (Post 918491)

Anyone ever attend a funeral with an open bar?

Quote:

Originally Posted by footfootfoot (Post 918520)

Some open bar weddings I've attended have effectively been funerals...

OK, I've told this story a thousand times in my life, and probably a hundred here in the Cellar...but not everyone has heard it, so...

Years ago I was telling my family I want my funeral to be a party. I want an open bar, and I want people to come up to the podium or whatever and talk about something really funny or dumb I did. I want laughter and celebration.

Brother: Great, now that we have it all planned, let's set a date!

So sorry, V. I know we've talked of this many times. It seems as though things have accelerated so much lately. I'm but a phone number away. Hang tight. FOcus forward. You've always been very good at that.

Thanks brother. I know, and I will.

It has been fast. SonofV was decompressing the other day and commented on the speed of developments. He said, "I was so surprised when we got back from Switzerland and the walker was there (in the house)." We got back from Switzerland at the end of July. So by December, her bedroom was moved downstairs. It has all been very, very fast.

@ im, that is hilarious! But, please, I'm patient, very patient, mmkay?

Well let's not wait so long that we're too impaired to enjoy the party

emergency trip to the hospital now.