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-   -   Gentlemen, meet your replacement (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=1851)

BrianR 07-13-2002 03:31 PM

Gentlemen, meet your replacement
 
1 Attachment(s)
http://cellar.org/qualityimages/sybian_rotate.gif

This is truly a wild machine (or so I'm told). Every woman I've polled who has tried one swears that as soon as they make one that also mows the lawn, her man is GONE!

I forget who asked me about machines that do the "work" for us, but here they are

Brian

Nic Name 07-13-2002 05:54 PM

I'm sure there's a place for these things. I just don't think I'd put one in the cellar.

Undertoad 07-13-2002 07:25 PM

(shrug) It does nothing for me, but maybe it will stimulate conversation.

MaggieL 07-13-2002 08:53 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Undertoad
(shrug) It does nothing for me, but maybe it will stimulate conversation.
At the very least.

Tony, it's not <i>supposed</i> to do anything for <b>you</b>. Unless there's a side of you you've been keeping quiet about all these years.

Can't say I've seen any of these devices as an animated GIF before. The motion isn't quite what I would have in mind, but then even at my advanced age I have limited experience in some aspects of this. I'm one of the few Dwellars who's been a virgin more than once

I got the impression he other gadget these folks make has more of a....how shall I say it?...."axial motion"? Rather more like a piston than whatever you would call that there pot-stirring action.

It is intriguing though....

As for replacing men, there's already no men in this household and we mow our own lawn, so that saves a step. But there are things men can do that this gadget can't.

Some of those things are actually desirable. Not all of them, but some of them.

NIc, dunno about you, but I don't keep sex toys in the cellar. Brian, OTOH, is prolly another story.

SteveDallas 07-13-2002 10:42 PM

sex toys in the cellar??? :3eye:

Wait, wait... let me figure this out... is somebody supposed to post and say that they used to have one of these, but they didn't like it, so they threw it out the back door?

BrianR 07-13-2002 11:12 PM

You never know, Maggie ;)

I keep my sex toys in the closet, I don't have a cellar. Appropriate, neh?

And lastly, the device was introduced to the attendees at a Tasteful Treasures party as a replacement for men by a woman whose husband is away serving his country for six months. She's threatening to move him into the spare bedroom upon his return. Oh yeah, he doesn't yet know about this particular purchase. I'm sure she's really kidding, but then again the dreamy look on the volunteer tester's face told a somewhat different story. After three (I counted) orgasms in fifteen minutes, she had to be helped up and into a handy futon. No comment as to whether or not there was a male volunteer, but I know the answer. :D

The Sybian pictured has both a vibrating motion as well as a rotating motion, via separate controls. There's even an attachment for two females at once. I'm told that the sensations are best when a partner plays with the control box.

You have to click on the link if you prefer a pistoning motion.

Note to anyone planning a purchase...the Sybian shown sells for $1345. No, I didn't miss a decimal, That's one thousand, three hundred forty five dollars. Plus S&H. Plus sales tax.
Financing is available through a third party financier. If anyone has one they want to unload through the back door, hand it over! I can make a LOT of friends with it.

I've seen it in use and even seen rides raffled off. It does stimulate men, although women are the intended users.
There is also a male version for sale at the Sybian website . I'll let you see that one for yourself. It's not cheap either. But in the long run they tend to be cheaper than a real woman. Figuring in sales, new shoes, various accessories than women seem to require on a regular basis, normal female maintenance and not even going into the divorce costs that may or may not present themselves, it tends to be cheaper to just get a reliable machine. They're just not much fun to cuddle with after.

Brian the Kinky:D

Tobiasly 07-13-2002 11:32 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by BrianR
If anyone has one they want to unload through the back door,
Freudian slip? Admit it Brian, <B>you</B> were the secret male volunteer!

BrianR 07-14-2002 02:36 PM

I ain't talking!
 
Go on, torture me! I won't talk. You can't make me! Really. Torture me and let me prove I won't talk!
I'll never tell! Nyah nyah nyah!

What's a Freudian slip anyway? Are you callin me a crossdresser? I prefer soft nighties to slips anyway.

Ooops! I shouldn't have told you that...:p

Brian

juju 07-14-2002 05:24 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MaggieL

As for replacing men, there's already no men in this household and we mow our own lawn,

... so to speak...

:)

MaggieL 07-14-2002 09:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by juju


... so to speak...

:)

I beg your pardon?

juju 07-14-2002 11:56 PM

Sorry.. sometimes I just can't resist. I will try to restrain myself in the future. :)

That Guy 07-15-2002 12:07 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by juju
restrain myself in the future. :)
Long weekend ahead, huh?

Nothing But Net 07-15-2002 12:42 AM

Sure, it can provide sexual pleasure that no man could possibly top, but who are you gonna call when the dyke is leaking?

MaggieL 07-15-2002 09:02 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Nothing But Net
Sure, it can provide sexual pleasure that no man could possibly top, but who are you gonna call when the dyke is leaking?
"Another dyke" is the usual answer.

jaguar 07-17-2002 03:04 AM

sexual innuendo overload..
Meh. Half the fun of sex is before and after, i'm not feeling threatened yet.

maggie that last comment reminded me of this song


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