Why I Would Prefer Not to Have Neighbors
 

Because skirmishes in a neighbor war suck.

I have been living in my apartment complex for 11 or maybe 12 years. I previously lived in a different unit in the complex for 4 years.

I have neighbors who moved in last summer. Two young men, probably in their 30s. I do not know if they are a couple or merely roommates.

They do not seem to have any female friends, but that's not important right now.

These neighbors (immediate next door, step-sharing neighbors, which is what makes them extra-horrendous) are not good neighbors.

One of their first actions on moving in was to cut about half of the branches off the willow tree that stands behind my back patio (not theirs) because the droopyness inconvenienced them.

They have exceptionally loud parties. They like house and trance music. They turn it up to 11. At 3AM. They also turn it up to 11 before midnight, but up until then I have a higher tolerance level. My television also has a volume button.

They had a drunken party on Halloween night and smashed pumpkins against the wall and door of my unit. They were, to be fair, their own pumpkins.

Tonight, however, takes the fucking cake.

I do not have direct evidence of their involvement. Just a suspicion. And a reasonably good one according to the very nice Sergeant of my local police department who came to my residence.

As I came in the door tonight, I unlocked it and then went to turn the knob, and came away with a handful of whitish, creamy substance.

Eeeeeaaaauuw. Actually, triple yecccccch with a side order of Eeeeeeaaaaauuw.

The substance appears to have been some variety of hand cream or liquid soap. So, it's merely juvenile rather than hitting the extremely gross level.

But I am very, very pissed.

Bad neighbors are hell. Haven't had one in a long time but reading your post brought back memories.

Your neighbors need to be frightened. Preferably, I think, by a third party.

Maybe you should bring them a plate of cookies. :D

Any help from the management of the complex? If they are trashing the outside of the building they are trashing the inside of their apartment, too.

....maybe break out the Glock.

Yes, someone needs to make them an offer that they can't refuse. Do you know any Italians in the 'hood?

edit: or you could tape one of these to their door:

http://www.fototime.com/BA8BE3453647C1A/standard.jpg

http://bcsconcealedcarry.com/images/34183.jpg
This might have an even better impact.

Wolf, I totally sympathize and wholeheartedly agree with you. I must say though, that your neighbors are amateurs when compared to my neighbors from hell over here in the Philippines. I bet my neighbors will trump yours anytime. The doorknob thing they did to you is a childish prank compared to the human feces that got smeared on our doorknob for months. I have since learned never to open a doorknob without wrapping it in a piece of tissue paper first. The said sick act is always done at night by the cowards. The neighborhood thugs also used my house for target practice by hurling those old 45 rpm records at our rooftop from midnight to 1 AM without fail till we finally had to call for police protection. Long story. I won't bore you with details.

I'm caught between the devil and the deep blue sea over here. I have a fire hazard, noise polluting illegal (read as no business permit) vehicle body repair shop next door run by drug addicts and a female pusher (they claim to be reformed as of the moment) and on the other side, I have my own relatives who will do everything they can to make sure that they destroy anything of mine that they can their hands on. My car has suffered a broken wiper arm, slashed tires, major body scratches and dents while parked inside our gated driveway. My very own cousin just recently mutilated our plants and trees in our flower bed (We had it built much to his chargin as he no longer could no longer openly harass my family) that divides the 2 homes in the compound because he refused to discuss a simple matter of not hanging his dripping wet car rugs over our flower bed grills without permission. The grills had already rusted due his practice. They are next door in our compound and they have their own gate. That doesn't stop them from jumping over anyway. But that's another long convoluted story.

Since the place I live in is just just a few minutes away from the worst part of the city, as in if Slang really wanted to walk the uinbeaten path, I should have given him a tour here, there is no sense in going to the police nor calling the barangay guards. It is just normal occurence to them. The most we always end up doing is filing blotters. Much good that does. At least you have a legal recourse that works if given the proper ammunition :)

Sounds to me like they are screaming out for attention.
Lonely, insecure and no where to go. They have their parties to create a friendship pattern with typical headbangers, inviting every noodle brained fool they can find. You might be fortunate enough to have some real fun with them if your of a mind to be practical. Freak 'em out goodstyle. Think about it, discuss it with a few trusted buddies and scare the living daylights out of them. If they are popping speed etc they will be paranoid anyhow, it would be easy to get them on one!

The women tear their blouses off
The men all dance on the table tops
It's closing time.

The holes in the target I have pinned to my bulletin board are somewhat closer together ... But I can't do anything that would be viewed as an actual threat, which a perforated target might be considered. I don't need these assholes knowing what my hobbies are anyway.

The management company is useless. They just need to keep everybody renting until the units sell.

I could come up with 1001 things to do TO these assholes, but I don't want the situation to escalate to real damage.

I am hoping for a short attention span on their parts, and karmic backlash to do it's little job.

I've read the Witch manual pretty thoroughly at this point, Wolf, and I can assure you that you are allowed to protect yourself and your home magickly. I'm sure you can think of *something*... :rar:

... or maybe screaming out for an ass whuppin.

I know.... I know.... I live in the rural South. Overlook me.

Sign them up for Playgirl , or any other gay rag you can find .

Oh and keep the GLOCK close at hand , don't be a percived threat , just be a prepaired one !!!

sign them up for Nugget. Maybe you can find a gay version...

Might be time to move to Upper Grifftopia or Central Slangsylvania... just a thought.

You could ask them for some some fingernail clippings or locks of hair, and state that you are making plans for a real special party.

Wolf, I'm sure I missed it, but do you own your unit? If not, is there some way the management could move you to a different unit? (By the way, I think moving yourself is total bullshit since the neighbors should be the ones moving).

I wish there was something I could do to help - that's gotta suck.

Try to make friends, visit them.
While you're there, look for a place you can drill a tiny hole through the wall that they won't see, like behind a couch.
Pump the place full of carbon monoxide.
Plug hole. :dead3:
__________________

I am currently working on avoiding owning my own unit ... these are rentals. The prior complex management significantly lowered their screening standards when they had to have full occupancy in order to sell the entire complex to the developer who is going to then sell off the individual units as condos. For way too much money. (I think I wrote something about this in the condo conversion thread). For a long time the high rents kept the riff-raff out, then it started keeping everybody out. They managed to get full occupancy by changing the pet ownership rules, lowering rents so new tennants are paying less than I do, and offering some "move in specials."


Done. And doing more.

I have some very strong magickal ethics, but I don't follow the Rede.

It depends on how adverse you are to moving. You should be able to renegotiate your rental, if you are willing to have your bluff called and move.

Unless you are planning on pulling up stakes anytime soon, owning is not a bad option taxwise if you can find value.

When I saw Bob's house in Mt. Airy I was very impressed. They fix up real nice. If the neighborhood is going upscale, then buying there is not a bad idea except for the commute.

I won't go into Philadelphia for an assortment of reasons, including the wage tax. I also do not wish to move farther away from work.

I have wanted to retaliate against a neighbor who is challenging the rule to have a pickup truck in our community which is prohibited by the HOA. I personally have no problem against his 60 grand Escalade but the rules are the rules and he has sued the HOA ... all our rates just went up 50% to fight the lawsuit.

I have thought long and hard on how to get revenge for taking money out of my pocket just so he can have his truck (which he could put in his garage but refused to do so to make his point). I don't, however, want to go to jail for doing something stupid against him. :rattat:

DAMN

I'm glad I live in the country.

:shotgun:

I grew up in the country (definition: being able to walk out your back door and fire off any and all firearms you own without anyone caring or noticing).

Not down here in South Fla however ... I had to go to the range to day in order to play with the new laser sight on my 1911. :rar:

Sad thing is... soon there won't be any 'country' left.

How about getting revenge on whoever in the HOA decided to fight the lawsuit?

Speaking of poo... the flaming paper bag of dogshit on the doorstep trick?

Though if you want those jerks to take their problem elsewhere, you're going to have to really chivvy the condo association a lot. Push hard. Your neighbors are impossible and must be exiled.

Wolf - this won't get rid of your neighbors, but it could be funny...

It seems that your neighbors are stay up late partiers, so they must not have regular 9-5 jobs. Just a guess.

Go get yourself an electrical timer, and set your stereo up to play a dull but piercing whining/ beeping only-dogs-should-hear-it-but-it's-just-below-the-threshold sound for about three hours while you are at work.
Set it to start about an hour after you leave for work, and have it stop around noon.

Have you ever stayed at hotel where someone who previously occupied the room next to you set the clock alarm for like 5am? Freakin annoying.

After an evening of "raving", that would be really irritating.. and since it's for a short period of time while you are not home, it would be awful hard for them to point the finger at you.

Give it a try!!

Yikes. The HOA cannot pick and choose which violations they enforce. The minute they overlook one that was brought to their attention, they become toothless (legally) since any subsequent lawsuit will surely point out that other infractions were permitted.

I don't think its entirely fair to blame the HOA for enforcing its rules. Those rules were part of the reason folks moved in there to begin with. The blame lies squarly with the offending neighbor upon whom much wrath is deserved.

And now, a precedent has been set such that others who might be tempted to skirt the regs know that they will have to fight a battle in court to win.

This can be a good thing if you live next door to a guy who decides to put his car on blocks in the front yard and hang his dirtly laundry from his windowsills they day before you meet with the listing agent to sell your house.

Wolf - superglue in their keyhole.

Is that some sort of metaphor?

No, that would be "wrap your doughnut around their hotdog" or "make them drive their train into your tunnel" or "stick it in their brown eye."

I suppose the logical and yet somehow impossible solution would be to change what is a dumb rule. That's what should have done when they saw this coming, instead of raising your rates to fight a lawsuit that most likely will not be won. This doesn't mean I think that all HOA rules are dumb, but who cares what anyone drives? As long as it doesn't look too trashy or is on cement blocks.

My limited experience with HOA's leads me to believe this is a losing proposition all around. I had a friend who lived in a very nice neighborhood that had a HOA. There were very strict rules regarding utility buildings that could be placed on the property, and other ridiculous rules. What changed the HOA rules was that the economy really tanked and about 15% of the homeowners had to bail out and sell their homes, and in order to do so, the rules had to be relaxed to make their properties saleable.

The 'rules are the rules' argument doesn't wash. I've always preferred the common sense approach myself. But that's all out the window now that the damn lawyers are involved. Too bad for you that it had to go that way.

We all want to live in nice neighborhoods, but few of us would want to sacrifice all our personal choices to do so. And in this country, why should we?

Why not poll your neighbors to see what they think? If most don't care about the Escalade (an SUV not truck) then get the rule changed and settle it quickly. ;)

Weren't these associations were developed in part to avoid the democratization of daily life? If they start changing the rules, you'll get people voted off the Island. I'm fine with folks joining them, but I'd have a hard time finding like-minded folks willing to put up with firearms, loud music, on-going construction, goats, dogs, and chickens so, I'm a hillbilly.

I thought they were to enforce deed covenants and take care of maintenance. :confused:

Sure. The deed covenants, however, are more encompassing than "normal".

Actually they're are not for this day and age. They've been building sub-divisions around Philly that some pretty strict covenants. Swing sets and sheds must match your neighbors, no outside clotheslines, no flagpoles, etc, etc.
In addition some of the local governments have jumped onto the Big Brother bandwagon. Springfield Township, Delaware County (pop 24k), has passed an ordnance saying if you have a vehicle with advertising on it, like a tradesman's truck, you can't park in in your own driveway. So Joe the plumber, must park his van in a rented space somewhere and have another way to get home. :(

In addition some of the local governments have jumped onto the Big Brother bandwagon. Springfield Township, Delaware County (pop 24k), has passed an ordnance saying if you have a vehicle with advertising on it, like a tradesman's truck, you can't park in in your own driveway. So Joe the plumber, must park his van in a rented space somewhere and have another way to get home.

Fuck THAT !!!! I would go get some blank magnetic pannels made up at the local sign shop !!!

In Germantown TN you can't have any Christmas lights but clear , no basket ball hoops , your house MUST be painted in an EARTH tone , and the STUPIDITY goes on from there !!!! And YES they WILL throw your ass in jail and fine the HELL out of you for violateing any of these "covenents "

Thank GOD I live in the sticks ,
If I wanted to paint my house Day-Glo Green I could ,
now folks would LOOK at us funny ,
But we would be a land mark ,
"Go down past that uggly ass green house , turn left at ,,,,,,,,, "

I agree the rule is somewhat bogus. I can see both sides as I would not mind having a nice truck but there are a lot of them that are not that nice out there. (course that applies to cars as well).
But it is the rule and it is starting to look like it will be upheld and the clown will have to pay all of us back for the attorney fees. :D
This battle apparently has been fought many many times and the only way the person can fight it is to get their vehicle declared as something other than a truck. This guy was trying to use the sport utility route ... but even GM, when comparing the Escalade to a comparable vehicle, picks the F150. Oops.

According to the Feds, my PT Cruiser was a truck. :eyebrow:

:lol:

It's one thing to knowingly sign on to this nonsense and quite another to have your neighbors vote to foist it upon you after the fact.

QUOTE=FloridaDragon]I agree the rule is somewhat bogus. I can see both sides as I would not mind having a nice truck but there are a lot of them that are not that nice out there. (course that applies to cars as well).
But it is the rule and it is starting to look like it will be upheld and the clown will have to pay all of us back for the attorney fees. :D
This battle apparently has been fought many many times and the only way the person can fight it is to get their vehicle declared as something other than a truck. This guy was trying to use the sport utility route ... but even GM, when comparing the Escalade to a comparable vehicle, picks the F150. Oops.[/quote]

Even if the HOA wins, you might not get your money back. Unless there's a specific provision in the settlement, or the HOA bylaws specifically stating so, I wouldn't count on it. And if this guy is as motivated as you've portrayed in your posts, don't bet on it at all, because the first go round probably won't be the last.

And there are other ways to get revenge, even if he does lose. Once my husband had a very nice beach front home in a very rich neighborhood in southern CA. The HOA was always giving him hell about driving his commercial vehicles down the street, parking them behind a security fence on his property (the vehicles could not be seen from the street.) AND Just for the record there was no HOA when he moved in.

But after enough hassles he decided to leave. He sold the home to a Pakistani business man who had a lot of money, but very few personal hygiene habits. In the end he left the home abandoned and uninhabitable (on 9/12/2001), and the Health Department came and condemned it. It had to be torn down, which was a shame, because it was such a historic place.

Those neighbors that once gave my husband such a hard time called to ask that he come back, take over the home again, and restore it (he worked construction.)

HOAs can have the power to approve/disapprove who you can sell your house to, but lots of money can get around that. Remember, the neighbor you know now can be a lot better than the future neighbor you don't.

I've never had to deal with an HOA personally, but I get the idea that in the end, you don't own your own property, because you don't have any control over it. The HOA has the control. Might as well give them the deed too.

City, county, state and federal laws should be sufficient to protect your property. If those aren't, then that's where the changes ought to be made. If those HOA rules are good enough for you in your neighborhood, wouldn't those rules be good enough for everybody, everywhere and be legislated for everyone's benefit? If it's so nice, shouldn't we all live under the same rules you do?

I know the rule banning the ownership of a truck would go over well in redneck rural Wisconsin, to say nothing of the reaction it would inspire in the truck manufacturers. :driving:

You say that you think the rule is bogus, but what are you doing about it?

But I really don't care that the rule is bogus ... I don't own a truck and have no interest at the moment of buying one. So this clown is just costing me money indirectly due to the lawsuit. I would rather do somthing about this idiot than the rule to be honest. If he wins, then every other yoyo is going to step up and try to push the rules since there will be blood in the water.

I have been in contact with the HOA president and you are probably correct that the small amount of money we all had to pitch in to fight this lawsuit will probably not come back to us if the HOA wins...instead it will go into a legal fund waiting for the next person to come along with the "all about me" attitude. But, our rates will go back to normal immediately after the lawsuit is over (per the president who seems to be a straight shooter).

What? How the hell does he come under the jurisdiction of an ad hoc committee of neighbors when there is no deed covenants or legal standing. I'd tell them to pound sand and sue them for harassment. :mad:

What happened was the neighbors that wanted the HOA waited for my husband to be gone on a job for a few weeks and voted it in. Well, that was not quite legal and reversals were made after he returned.

He still did what he wanted, but general harassment continued. It was just easier to sell and be done with it. What's funny is that the HOA whole-heartedly approved of the sale, so desperate they were for Mr Fargon to sell and move out.

Then after a few weeks a stench was noticed, and the cause was located. The new neighbor had an aversion to modern toilets and sanitation practices. And there was absolutely NOTHING they could do about it. It was the new neighbors' culture, he had the right to live that way, and apparantly his 'special passport' made him untouchable by all our laws. The neighbors got to enjoy the results of their decision.

That's why the property was condemned and had to be torn down after it was abandoned.

It wasn't sold to to him on purpose of causing more problems, it just karmically worked out that way.

Then after a few weeks a stench was noticed, and the cause was located. The new neighbor had an aversion to modern toilets and sanitation practices. And there was absolutely NOTHING they could do about it. It was the new neighbors' culture, he had the right to live that way, and apparantly his 'special passport' made him untouchable by all our laws. The neighbors got to enjoy the results of their decision.

It wasn't sold to to him on purpose of causing more problems, it just karmically worked out that way.

[Nelson] HA HA !!!!! [/Nelson]

But, but, but, fuck them. They are not a political sub-division, just a bunch of neighbors with delusions of grandeur. They have no authority.
I understand why he sold, just because he didn't want to live near these assholes anymore. I might eventually too, but I'd sure as hell make their lives an expensive nightmare until I did. Maybe after I did, too. :rar: