Finest commencement speech ever
 

Jon Stewart at his alma mater, William and Mary

"We declared war on terror. We declared war on terror—it’s not even a noun, so, good luck. After we defeat it, I’m sure we’ll take on that bastard ennui."

Never heard of Jon Stewart but brilliantly written speech - worth reading if just for the bit at the end (!).

Great speech, but "terror" is indeed a noun. I know what he meant, but sometimes I gotta nitpick.

Get thee to Comedy Central, Mon-Thu at 11pm! Best fake news show available.

ahem... 11pm Eastern time.

Sometimes I gotta nitpick. :)

Not to nitpick or anything but Catwoman is in the UK. I don't think they get Comedy Central. :)

Was just going to ask - can I get it in the UK. Maybe it's on sky?

It's too culture-bound to be funny to Brits - just like Not the Nine O'Clock News was culture-bound to Brits and not as funny to 'merkins.

Are you saying we have no understanding of American culture even though we have simply osmosised, ectyped and shrunk-to-fit everything you have sent over on your really big ships?

Apologies for my lack of global awareness. You can get highlights from the web site.

I think that much, perhaps most, of the humor is universal enough to traverse the oceans. Stupid politics is stupid politics.

No CW, I'm saying that comedy is more culture-bound than any other form, and that while some people would be able to understand all the subtle cultural tones needed to enjoy it 100%, others would be mystified and not entertained and would ignore it, in large enough numbers to justify the decision to broadcast something else.

Now I know why you didn't get Hollyoaks.

I had the worst commencement speaker ever. The people in the spring semester graduating class got former Canadian PM Brian Mulroney. We (the fall semester graduating class) got the head of Edward Jones. Goddamn, he was boring...I can't remember a thing he said.

I didn't even bother going to any of my commencements (well, ok, that's not true, I went to my high school graduation.)

You know who would have been really cool to have as a commencement speaker? Mr. T.

I thought I'd heard something about CNN international picking up the Daily Show for late late night...it struck me, because I thought that was cool and strange both. Maybe Ive made it up...

One of my side jobs is graduation photography, so I've seen it all and heard them all. After September 11th, we'd all get together and play "terrorist bingo". We'd get cards, place words on them like terror, osama, world trade center, patriotism, with jesus as the free square. As the speech would go on, we'd start marking them off. It took all our energy to not yell "bingo!" in the middle of the speech.

Mr. Marion Barry crashed my high school graduation. I'm not certain whether he was mayor at the time. Sweating profusely (not particularly surprising, it was June in DC with no AC), he spouted a few "inspirational" platidudes, standing next to the bewildered student council president, and disappeared.

It was the only redeeming feature of an otherwise crushingly boring and sweltering morning.

I had Cosby.

Temple, eh?

My college commencement speaker (undergrad) was Shirley Chisolm. I don't remember one damn thing she said.

I was anxious to get on with the drinking.

My Master's Degree speaker was some unknown, but well off, former graduate of the University.

Matt, you went to U of M, right?

Shirley Chisholm, now that's cool...even if you don't remember it.

God, my school fucking sucked.

Its the student speeches that always get me. Last Friday I attended a High School graduation in which the valedictorian gave a speech that made me think he had a savior complex.

"Here I stand before you, with nothing to hide..." he said, taking off his robe to reveal his dress shirt underneath. He paused for drama, acting as if he couldn't find the words and seemed to find inspiration by looking into the stage lights with tears in his eyes. "...with no secrets to keep from you. I must tell you now that you, the students, and your families are the most important thing to me second only to one thing: my relationship with Jesus Christ."

The crowd went completely insane with applause for what seemed like five minutes. Students threw their hats into the air. Horns sounded. The crowd stood. The cheering didn't seem to end and only grew with intensity as the prinicpal stood and clapped.

In my high school, that would have gotten your ass kicked and complaints from parents.

Ah, small town high school graduations are so amusing.

At Symphony Hall in Boston, June 13th, 1964. Commencement address by Dr Bengjamin C. Willis, General Superintendent of Schools, Chicago, Illinois. Wonder what he said?:confused:

Hahahahahah. I've said it before I'll say it again. Class in a glass.

We get a fair bit of American comedy via the Comedy Central channel on sky tv....usually anything that does well on our branch of Comedy Central then makes it onto terrestrial....Politically Incorrect is good I liked that back when I had skytv....I think you're right about some of the comedy being more culturally specific than others though UT.....there are some areas where the sense of the joke doesnt necessarly translate but I really think it works across the water more oftne than it doesnt....either that or our TV network execs are doing a damn fine job of streaming out the really really American stuff :D

Even the politics....We get a fair amount of Stateside political coverage over here, especially during an election year....oh and any time you guys do something really really strange so that we can all look superior, roll our eyes and say "only in America" *blinks*

Mostly though.....I think humour divides more alongclass/economic or political identity lines than along National ones.

You'd like the Daily Show. That's a primary staple.

i can understand why you would be disappointed but to the right audience he would have been great. sorry, i'm a broker with Edward Jones and have to admit i like listening to both John Bachman and Doug Hill speak.

I wouldn't have a clue either, but in an odd twist of fate, I was best friends in elementary school with the son of his successor ...

I think you meant stupid. (See banana guard thread for details.)

Yep, University of Maryland College Park, where our most famous graduate (Jim Henson) died because he was too dumb to come in out of the rain.

I had Lee Iaccoca. Or was it someone who worked with Lee Iaccoca? That sounds more likely.

I would have preferred Imogene Coco

Did you all get free pudding pops?