NASCAR
 

Nascar, entertainment suitable for mutants and farm animals. Oh, wait, if I subject my goats to that crap, I'd get curdled milk for for a month. And get boycotted by PETA.:flipbird: No matter how you look at it NASCAR bites the big one.:turd:

The one good thing about NASCRAP is that the drivers still know the fans are the only reason for their existence. Well there are a few exceptions, Tony Stewart. For the most part though the drivers still come out and actually talk and sign autographs for the fans. I know there are some other 'sport players' that will still talk to the average joe but for the most part it's all about the money to them.

I do wish there were more stock to the term 'stock' car though. I think it'd be cool to see something that actually resembles a car you can buy to compete. I might watch a race or two then.

Come on down to Houston and the Westheimer strip any Saturday night.

Of course, you couldn't call most of those beasts 'stock', either.

I think it'd be more amusing to see lower end "stock." I mean everybody knows a Corvette will go fast. Why don't we stack up a Ford Escort vs. a Honda Civic or a Chevy Prism and a Dodge Neon and see what happens? :cool:

So what do you watch and deem "suitable"?

Baseball is a wreck with it's salary joke, football is becoming a little more WWF every year, basketball is even worse.

NASCAR is great! Most people who rip on it don't have a clue. Also take a good look at the pre-race ceremonies some day before you go on about the hillbilly rednecks...at least they get a crowd (and drivers & crews) to show a little respect for the anthem & prayer. Then watch the superbowl with the Ray Lewis types doing there dance and grabassing, etc.

Who cares about the god damned prayer? The USA is not now, nor has it ever been a Christian nation.

Who cares about a bunch of rednecks driving in circles? Other rednecks. The same idiots who attend monster truck rallies.

What's got 100,000 legs and 200 teeth? The audience of a NASCAR race.

It wasn't about the prayer, rather seeing a group of people showing a little respect for something vs. watching a bunch of gangsta wannabes.

I just love you holier than thou types. I enjoy NASCAR & I am a HUGE Green Bay Packer fan, so that's basically how I like to spend my time relaxing on Sundays.

Some may think 3+ hours doing that is a waste of time, if it's something that gives someone pleasure who are you to rip on them and define what is suitable, and if you don't agree they're just idiots?

So my question still is this....what do you consider "suitable" ( I THINK we're discussing televised sporting events) then?

The Man Show. Definitely The Man Show.

Umm....Rallies, Superbike races...

Way more 'skill based' than NASCAR.

More fun than NASCAR:
http://www.motorcycle-usa.com/newsphoto/BenDay2(1).jpg


Cool BIG photo..

Oh and showing respect for what?

I think prayers belong to churches and the privacy of ones home.

The most uncomfortable moment of my life was being naturalized as the citizen of the US and having to say "Under God"...by the way.. I didn't.

OK, only seen it a couple times but that is a funny show!

List of groups that it's still okay to publicly ridicule:
1. Hillbillies (white trash, rednecks, peckerwoods, Nascar fans, et al.)
2. Hippies
3. the French
4. the Amish.

We are proud, not only of our sport, but of our country. We haven't shunned our God, which is who this country was built under. We don't burn our flag. NASCAR fans will let you know how America in general feels. We are the heart and soul of the true blue American.

Blue 58. This country was NEVER built under god.

It was built under freedom. None of the fouding fathers were strong believers in "god".

If that was the most uncomfortable moment you must have led a pretty pansy assed life.

You know NOTHING of my life so please don't make such idiotic statements.

The Man Show is NOTHNG without genius Adam Carolla!

Just trying to fit in. :cool:

Fit into what? Are you implying that my statements were equally idiotic?

If you want proof of any of them, just ask.

Meanwhile would you like to go and dig up some proof to show that my life has been "pansy ass"ed indeed?

Aw cmon FNF, that was a good line.

Uhh, yeah.....maybe you're not as dumb as you sound.

No thanks.

Could care less really.

Why not make it a tagline then?

"The Cellar: Where one has to make idiotic statements just to fit in!"


Oh and Blue58...if you don't care..why do you even respond to my posts?

Hell why even post in the first place?

You post what appears to be something you feel strongly about and as soon as someone disagrees you make idiotic statements, sidestep, and then don't care anymore?

Doug Stanhope is _hysterical_... when he's doing stand-up. When he's reading from the Man Show teleprompter and following their script, on the other hand...

He's a mild example of the dreaded Sagetization Effect, which is the process where a network takes a funny comic and straps him onto a tame and less-to-completely-unfunny comedy premise. The patron saint is Bob Saget, whose promising standup career derailed in favor of playing straight-man to the Olsen Twins and reading lame Teleprompter quips about yutzes' home videos, but there are hordes of other examples out there.

As for NASCAR, one of the saddest things I've ever seen happened one Sunday when I was coming home from my girlfriend's parent's house. As soon as I hit the US 11-15 junction, there were HUGE crowds on the southbound side, and it kept going for miles -- kids, parents, lawn chairs, flags, banners, the whole shebang. I was genuinely puzzled -- it was too late in the summer for a July 4th fireworks display, parades wouldn't go down a major highway, and as far as I knew, the Presidential motorcade wasn't in town...

I stopped at a Subway for a snack, and asked what was going on. The clerk explained that there'd been a NASCAR race in New York that weekend, and that the trucks with the racecars would be passing through this afternoon.

I verified that these were closed trucks. It's not as if the drivers themselves would be on them, let alone waving to the crowds like homecoming-court candidates or weaving through traffic in their vehicles. It's not as if the cars themselves would be visible, for fear that some diehard Earnhardt fan would throw a pipe bomb into Jeff Gordon's car, or anything like that. It's not as if they were going to stop and kiss babies and shake hands and let people see the cars up close. Nope, these were just tractor-trailers passing through, like any other traffic.

After verifying this, I asked rather loudly, "You mean that these people are standing around in 95-degree heat just to cheer on the EQUIPMENT TRUCKS?" The clerk cracked up, saying "Yeah, it happens every year," while a woman in a Rusty Wallace shirt across the room gave us both an uncomprehending scowl.

I got my sandwich and left, and the mass of alleged humanity on the roadside continued. I reached my exit, and ten or fifteen cars were LINING THE SHOULDER OF THE OFF-RAMP!

The next section of Route 15 was much more rural and wide-open than downtown Shamokin Dam. There were still groups of people at roadside, including some in Amish/Mennonite gear. This amused me to no end, as I imagined them having a cow in their back yards with a TV embedded in its side so that they could watch the races. "Turn ye to the left, Bessie, the picture's getting fuzzy."

Then there was one guy who had a full-size Jeff Gordon cutout with him at roadside. By now I was _howling_ with laughter, which got me a "What's so funny" look from the World's Second-Biggest Jeff Gordon Fan.

I say second-biggest because the best was yet to come. Some yutz a mile or two down the road had unplugged a SODA MACHINE with some NASCAR driver's picture on it and wheeled it to the side of the road. I nearly drove off the road when I saw that. (I really hope he worked at the store that he "borrowed" it from.) It was if this was some sort of Great Pumpkin test, where Jeff Gordon would rise up in the most sincere fan's pumpkin patch and say "YOU like me! You can ride shotgun with me next week at Talladega."

Up until that point, I had viewed NASCAR fans as being sort of like non-clued-in pro wrestling fans -- you know, the Springer-audience types who are genuinely morally offended when Triple H bashes Stone Cold with a chair, as compared to those who view the spectacle as a Hollywood stunt show gone horribly wrong. Both NASCAR and such wrestling fans enjoy watching repetitive, somewhat predictable "sporting events." Both follow larger-than-life characters with unswerving fandom, and are often emotionally upset when someone around them favors the other guy. Both pastimes are often more entertaining when something goes violently wrong than when everything goes smoothly.

But I could never imagine even diehard wrestling fans lining the Northeast Extension to cheer on a truck carrying the ring ropes, the Rock's wardrobe, Stone Cold's knee pads and similar equipment.

And the saddest thing of all was that while many of these roadside worshippers looked offended when I'd stop at a red light and they'd hear my laughter... the majority looked more confused than anything else. You could almost hear the wheels spinning in their heads -- "Heeeeeeey, he's LAUGHING at us. How can he not understand why we're out here?"

Because FNF, I'm really not here to have a discussion with or about you. If we're discussing something in the same thread, sure I'll reply, but have no desire to get into some long drawn out argument with you, I've read enough of your posts to realize it isn't worth the effort. Some people just don't find you as entertaining as others perhaps.

This is one of those Matters Of Taste vsp... because I find that Doug Stanhope has few redeeming qualities even as a stand-up, and I worship stand-up comedy.

Statement of wisdom you may feel free to ignore: this venomous attitude is far less productive than you think it is. You're wasting a lot of energy on nothing. You don't need to fight every fight. It doesn't change anything and only promotes anger and dissent. Sometimes the best bet is to shrug and walk away.

That story was hilarious (and yeah a little sad too) vsp! But what the hell, if that many people show up, throw in a little alcohol, may be a good time.

I especially got a kick out of the Amish part. We've quite a few Amish around here and they're pretty reserved (like you'd expect...they're Amish!) but one buggy I've seen has a pair of purple fuzzy dice hanging by the wind shield, and every once in awhile when a large group goes by for some gathering, you can tell they are racing...taking side streets, trying to cut each other off, etc.

I agree 100%. I hear a fair amount of standup these days thanks to the comedy channel on my XM satellite radio. When you hear somebody like Ellen Degeneres or Ray Romano, or even Roseanne Barr, you realize why somebody thought they ought to be on TV. Which you usually wouldn't figure out based on their TV show itself.

yeah, and bob sagget is friggin hysterical when he's allowed to "work blue"....dude's mind works fast!
i don't remember what show i saw with him, but i remember being amazed that the dipshit from the aforementioned tv shows was actually quite funny.

Can you say, SCCA. You can see them all.;)

Why? If you believe in God then it's not a problem and if you don't believe in God then it's just following the script, again not a problem.
I'm not breaking balls, just curious why this made you so uncomfortable? :confused:

Why? Because the word "god" has no place in any oaths, on our currency, or in our laws. It should never be used by a country that supposedly advocates the freedom of religion; especially one that was built on the premise of the complete separation of church and state like America.

Well you see, I do not believe in god and saying that I am swearing allegiance to a nation "under god" is in a sense swearing allegiance to god. Because well...the nation is 'under him'.

I have no problem with allegiance to the US, but for me god is out of the question.
Naturalization IS a big deal to me as is my position on the non existence of god. I felt that if I didn't say the pledge then I wasn't 'really' naturalized but then if I said it, I'd be saying something that I absolutely do not believe in. That made me very uncomfortable. In the end I just stood there while everybody else spoke the pledge.

It's like getting married without being able to say I do. It's just not the same.

Have you tried to get a marriage license? You know you have to put your hand on the bible to do that? Why? I don't believe in god. I'll tell you the truth with my hand up my ass rather than with it on the bible.

I didn't. There wasn't any mention of a bible.

Must be a PA thing...or Springfield thing...sigh
Maybe the clerk was a retard...she had so much trouble with my name it made me want to puke. Plus she was acting really amused. "Gloukhoff" is NOT that long, "Oh dear...oh it's so hard..oh how do you say that..oh my..oppsie I typed it wrong AGAIN...here we go...almost there". It's not funny. It's idiotic and insensitive.

Got our marriage license in Media, PA. There was no bible invloved.

Got my marriage license in Atlanta, GA. No bible here either, in the bible belt no less. This makes me wonder how much other shit FNF is pulling out of his ass.:turd:


GBA

DNK

I'm not making the shit up.

This is the place I went to:

Delaware County
Media, PA
610.891.4400

They sure as hell made me give them $50 and put my hand on the bible. Call them up and ask them if you don't believe me.

Hennepin County, MN- bibleless.

Nascar = traffic. I dont like traffic.

Bob Sagget? I can not imagine any scenario, blue or otherwise, in which he would exhibit any comedic talents. His fame has always baffled me.

Gha was I really the only one?

If so I'll write an offended letter. I just thought it was common practice and didn't want to make a fuss out of it especialy since the clerk was already making it look like I was torturing her with my name. Sigh...

I understand this. Oh, do I ever. My maiden name was a 3 syllable 13 letter german name that nobody could pronounce.

I stopped excusing people for screwing it up. It is really offensive when they make a big deal of it.

This makes sense. Since it's your right NOT to be offended. Come on man, thickin you skin.


GBA

DNK

DNK. Get some damn sense.

It's OK for me to be offended by you. It's ok for me to be offended by the idiots who support Bush. It's OK for me to be offended by the idiotic slogans that I see every day as I drive past a church to work. That's all fine. I can ignore all that.

It's NOT ok for me to be offended when I'm trying to do something that I NEED to do to get on with my life and is controlled by the government.

Dealing with the goverment that I pay taxes to support should NOT be offensive to me.

Bible?
 

Yep, no bible here either, although they did give me a bag full of crap....laundry soap, gift certificates, bunch a stuff I guess my wife thought was useful.

Funny thing is, about 3 years later I went to work there (not register of deeds office...county government tho), union, government workers...absolutely the laziest most arrogant bunch of "workers" I have ever been associated with. I have never seen a such a ridiculous waste of money on a daily basis....and don't get me started about the dept. of human services!

Dig up the infamous <a href="http://www.humorlinks.com/cgi-bin/amazon/amazon_products_feed.cgi?item_id=B00000DLU4&search_type=image&locale=us">9th Annual Young Comedians</a> HBO special, where Saget steals the show with rapid-fire patter. (The show also features Sam Kinison, Bob Nelson, Rita Rudner, Louie Anderson, Yakov Smirnoff, and Maurice LaMarche (voice of "The Brain" from Animaniacs).

The year before's is almost as good -- Dana Carvey, Joel (MST3K) Hodgson, Bill Maher, Paula Poundstone and the Amazing Jonathan.

I would love to track down a copy of "Opening Night at Rodney's Place," another HBO special that I once had on tape but have long since lost...

I got the bag too.

It had some Zest soap, some Dyno detergent, a bar of Secret deodorant and a bunch of coupons.

I thought that was funny. Thing is, in Russia despite the fact that good soap and deodorant or detergent was almost impossible to buy, giving it to somebody was considered extremely rude. It implied saying "You stink so bad you need this deodorant more than I do, while you're at it use this bar of soap on your self, oh and wash your damn clothes!"

And no I was not offended by that. I just though it was funny.

I still say that should've given me a pack of condoms...

I called. They swear you in just like you are testifying in court. So, while there is a bible on site, you don't have to place you hand upon it, simply raising you right hand will do. So it looks like you have an option since you were offended :rolleyes: , yet you failed to take it.


GBA

DNK

Sigh,

Thanks for clearing that up DNK. I was never really 'given' the option. She just stuck out the bible and said "Place your hand on this bibile."
I was already so frustrated with the name thing, I think we both just really wanted to get out of there as soon as possible and I didn't want to argue with the clerk. Well I might have had I been alone...

Anyway, once again thanks for clearing that up.

That sounds more like the NBA, but I'm not their biggest fan...

That's a typical tactic in Gumint offices and courts. They stick the bible under your nose and say "swear" and only give you the "or affirm" option if you object. Of course in court where you want to make a good impression, objecting might not be the best idea.

On the "under God" thing, I understand your reluctance but I just figure they can call it whatever they want. One nation, under sky, under bridge, underwater, understood, it's just someone else's description and doesn't impinge or confirm my beliefs.:)

It just so happens that I have a friend who is a deputy sheriff in Media, at the courthouse.

Checking in: he says that there is a Bible but swearing on it is optional.

DNK is right here.

Brian

Does every topic have to be God related?

I enjoy sharing my beliefs with other people at times, but to drag every conversation to a debate over the existence of God is a little much.

What happened to the friendly part of the cellar....You know a friendly little coffee shop with no coffee and no shop.... or was the and not friendly left out?

We're in a really pissy phase this month... least friendly it's ever been.

it's gotta be the holiday stress, man.....


maybe this would help?

--I like NASCAR. I think it takes a fair amount of skill to drive a car around a track at almost 200 mph, trying to make slick moves to grab the lead and making sure you "know" your car.

--I believe in God, but to each their own. I won't force my spiritual beliefs upon you if you won't force yours upon me...cool?

--The Cellar will be fine...we had a rough patch, and some of the mental patients are a bit frisky right now...but it'll work itself out.

now this is a serious di-hard fan!

I bet she's just as hairy

OHMYGOD! Is that human? Can you imagine the conversation?

Him: I need sumthin' to show my undying love and respect to that great man, Dale Ernheart, god rest his soul.

Her: Well just bless your heart. I know, we'll get Uncle Daddy the barber to shave a big ole' number three into the hair on your back.

Him: Yeah, and I'll have a number three tatooed on my pecket to.

Her: But honey, yore pecker is only a two.....*


It never ceases to amaze me how the topics here wander off in so many different directions.


*we're talking inches here

OH LO-HAD! i'll bet she needs a weed-eater!