NSFW - help me with an insult
 

What's a really terrible thing you could be mocked with an achievement award for? Along the lines of "servicing your millionth customer at the brothel." The cruder, the better.

Producing a turd so big it blocked the county sewer main for 24 hours.

Sent by magick

Excellent! More, please!

Culturing a system of dingle berries so profound as to constitute a separate universe.

Generating body odour so intense it drives the moon out of orbit.

Sent by magick

Producing a fart of such amplitude that it is mistaken for a solar flare.

Sent by magick

I would take that as a compliment.

I was thinking something more toxic.
You "Sir or Madam" are living proof of rectal conception. Or words to that effect.

Largest Canker Sore

Loosest Cooch @ Biker Fest '17

Worst Lay

Longest Ass Hair

Winner - Most Rats Accumulated Through Singing

Most Sweat Produced During A Church Service

Highest Mileage Virginnie

Loudest Pussy Fart

Most Wrinkly Nipples

Best Ass-Kisser

Cabbage Breath

Most Turn Downs At The Frat Orgy

Winner - Largest Collection of Used Condoms, (Not Your Own)

Driest Lady Garden

Ugliest Pussy

Musta lit it.:D

Pussy Most-Resembling A Really Bad Philly Cheese Steak Sammich

Most Eels Fitted Into A Single Body Cavity

Largest Collection of Smegma (Not Your Own)

...For Having Less Sense Than God Gave A Dill Pickle...

He's been jerking off so frequently that he's broken the 5 seconds to ejaculate time.

Frequent Fucker: Hundredth visit to the STD clinic

MVP -most vaginal pungeance

May your asshole grow Taste buds

Most prolific contributor of pubic hairs to the salad bar

Your bad taste equals your bad taste.

A burp is nasty, because your ass refused it.

One Year (Bowel) Accident Free!

The Outside The Box Award for most frequent premature ejaculation

Viledicktorian -for having the nastiest penis

Coworker that selflessly makes other employees appear more competent by comparison.

Team Player -for the office ho

His leadership qualities are legendary. His staff will follow him anywhere, if only out of curiosity.

Three time winner of the coveted, “three hobos; no cup award”, champion of the Last Goatse Standing, and keeper of the world’s largest anal fissure...

Not since 1978. Crohn's disease.

Pete!

Hey, cock

Hi Pete

Pete!!!!! Hey hey Hayyyyyyy

There's always Yo Mama..

Let's get back to basics:

"You Bitch!"

Mr Zicato!


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

but the basic request was for insults in the style of an achievement award......

I don't have anything to offer in that regard; so,

I'm sorry, I cannot help you ... I'm not a psychiatrist.

Lifetime Achievement Award - Worst Attempt At Not Being A Bitch, then.

perfect ;)

Most Highly-Rated Happy Ending masseuse in the Midwest region.

Progresses to the live section of the competition in Climax MI

Most likely to be killed by friendly fire

Highest contributing semen receptacle by volume.

Worst Hand Job

When you smell shit your dick gets hard.

For The Category "Vagina Most Resembling A Really Bad Grilled Cheese Sandwich", The Award Goes To...

I believe in the 90s there was a Dwellar who called another Dwellar:

"You weird itchy spot on my arm"

...like a mole with a big, thick, black hair growing out of it.