WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK? (longish rant)
 

So just a few minutes ago, right before she leaves, she starts off with her usual "I know you're probably going to be angry..." intro, which is partly true, because that kind of intro ALREADY makes me angry (annoyed really) and she tells me (I'm leaving out a lot of her BS equivocating) that she hid my guns because since I hadn't been talking to her lately (Hell fucking o? Remember the 97 times I said we wouldn't talk until there was a third person present?) and TWO YEARS AGO I told her that I was feeling suicidal (I didn't, wasn't, and am not) that she hid them out of concern for my safety.

This is yet another reminder to me, and I thank FSM for it, how way seriously-ass crazy she is.

a) Not the way to handle it
b) Typical melodrama bullshit that runs in her family
c) Typical bid for control of the situation
d) Typical lack of respect for boundaries
e) Typical bending of facts and or creating them from whole cloth
f) Keep your fucking hands off my guns
g) Need a combo locking cabinet
h) Fucking asshole drama queen
i) How soon will you be able to GTFO of my house?
j) Learn about the different diagnoses of depression and ask what mine is.
k) Suicidal ideation? Never had it, never will. (except when I contemplate the rest of my life spent with you.)
l) Go fuck yourself
m) Fuck you
n) Mind your own business
o) Get a clue
p) I hate you and that rabbit who shits and pisses all over the house
q) Ha Ha. You're such an idiot, my .22 is in the basement on my workbench.

After some questioning about if they were hidden in a spot where they will not be subjected to damage, she tells me she took them to someone else's house, 'who knows about guns,' (whatever the fuck that means) and will bring them back on Wednesday now that she knows I'm not going to kill myself. (Or realized her stupid ploy wouldn't get me to talk. Idiot)

I'm SO pissed at myself right now for having spent so many fucking years with her and not seeing just how crackers she is.

I'm the real idiot in this picture. She's just crazy.

Also, it's not about the guns, per se; they are nothing special and can easily be replaced. I'd feel the same way if she'd taken my gardening tools, or cameras or whatever. She's always been jealous of my going hunting and or target shooting because that is a form of independence of mine. It sexes up all her abandonment issues. That's part of what this is, also I was raised to treat other people's property as THOUGH IT BELONGED TO THEM. Whoa, there's a concept.

She told me she mentioned it to 'some people' (I'm guessing her brother and or 12 step folks) and they all said "OH RED FLAG!"

No, I haven't been withdrawn and morose then suddenly cheerful, giving away all of my shit, and all the crap that other people do when they are planning on checking out, I haven't been down in the dumps. And if I were going to off myself, I sure as hell wouldn't shoot myself. That's so fucked up. There really isn't a nice way kill yourself. She's the self injurious one in the house.

Fucking tool.

rant away, brother!

Sorry, man. I don't have any helpful advice, all I can say is I'm sorry.

Oh dear. Nothing I can say, really.


Sent by thought transference

Well, fucking fuck, 3ft. Rant away babes, as much and as often as needed til the bad shit's all done.

She finally realized she deserves two in the chest, one in the head, but not smart enough to know you aren't the one to do it. :crazy:

ha! And the bitch of it is I won't be sleeping any better at night until I get rid of all the kitchen knives.

Hmm. There's an idea...

Careful now...it's a slippery slope to paper plates and plastic forks.

Isn't that a shit in yer eye kinda deal...

That is a line that cannot be uncrossed. The next time I left the house, I'd come back with an armfuckingload of boxes.

The I'd tell her to "pack yer shit, or I can pack it for ya."

Bad situation, any way, any how, I feel for ya.

Make all her cosmetics go away , because they are Toxic and you know yer just looking out for her own good , dont ya know
And those High heels are TERRRRRRIBLE for her back , they Must go
And Oh Lord how can you put that CRAP in your hair , here is some generic SAFE shampoo

or sum such

holy fuckity fuck

Is it an obvious observation that the crazy one in this situation "hid" the guns? I must have a paranoid nature, sleep with one eye open or the door locked! :eek:

I have a different take on this, foot. I think you're being set up. Your wife is saying that the two facts that a) you've been diagnosed with depression and b) you have guns add up to a threat to her, she's involved someone else and given him/her this story, and will undoubtedly give this tale to her attorney, if she hasn't done so already. It's one way of having you removed from the house.

I'd suggest seeing an attorney asap. You mention that the guns don't have particular significance to you so you may want to let them go - let your attorney know that your wife has taken your guns, worth $xxx, and don't buy into the game of her 'letting' you have them back.

She's telling you that she sees you 'not talking to her' as a form of abuse and a sign of serious depression and possible threat. (A relative of mine, who suffers from a personality disorder, made this claim during her divorce. It didn't get her very far but your situation is different.) In that context, her removing the guns because she says she doesn't feel safe is a huge red flag that signals how she is going to proceed as you separate.

Please get legal advice asap. You don't want to be removed by police and have to fight an uphill battle re your children. Sorry this is happening. I'm with Grav - I think this is a line that can't be uncrossed because of all the implications. You can't force her to leave and you shouldn't leave yourself until you get legal advice, but this is a shot across your bow. Sorry.

Lawyer.

"My client informs me you have unlawfully removed from his possession certain items...blah blah ... tantamount to theft .. blah blah ... immediate return blah blah..."

The do what Grav said. Box up her shit, leave it on the porch, change the locks.

She's fucking with your head. Zero tolerance for that shit. This is why you're getting away from her in the first place.

From now on, wear latex or vinyl disposable gloves when you're cleaning your firearms and putting them away. The next time she touches them, only her fingerprints will be left behind which opens the door to several possibilities.

Fuck.

Been there, had that done to me. Very ugly, very expensive, very destructive. Was *completely* about her, nothing about me. 100% fucked up. No upside. Unless you learn from my experience.

I can overnight a Colt AR-15 Sporter 762 x 39. :haha:

Yeah, thinking about it, it does sound like she's being sneaky there Foots. Lawyer up and make notes. What day did she say xyz, what day did she take xyz, anything that could be used against you in a custody battle needs marking down now.

If she tries to pull something you have a record of your suspicions in time and how her actions stack up.

I will talk to a lawyer.
She doesn't wear any cosmetics, so throwing that out can't happen.
She has never been the sneaky, Machiavellian type but she may be getting coaching from others.

Even if it were to go to court re: my depression history every single therapist I've ever seen since I was first diagnosed will have in their records that I've never ever had suicidal ideations.

Knowing her and her background this is a bid for attention. She does things to elicit strong reactions. Silence has always threatened her. I really don't think she has the ability to put a set-up together. She has zero organizational skills and is a reactive person.

This is a near perfect description of her: (bolds mine)
I'm ready to lawyer up as a precaution. We see the joint counselor next week, I believe. She just signed the papers allowing our counselors to interact. I would love to be a fly on the wall for that convo. I'm sure my therapist will tell me the upshot.

jeeze.

:snicker:

:eek:

Two, TWO!, Dwellars agreeing with me?

Might I suggest you two either put down the bong, or seek medical/psychiatric attention/MRI/catscan?

Stat!

:p:

Does she have a formal diagnosis of borderline personality disorder? Or do you simply see those traits as strong components of her ways of interacting and handling things? Either way, be prepared for lots of drama. The relative I mentioned before has removed herself to women's shelters repeatedly over the years claiming that she's at risk of imminent harm, which has never been borne out. She has never succeeded in getting a PFA order, but she has had her husband marched out of his office in handcuffs by military police and put in holding barracks while they sorted out her claims. He would be released once it became clear that my relative had nothing to substantiate her initial claims (she would renege once pressed for details), but it was horrid all round.

Then, a day later, she would be posting on facebook about her wonderful husband (who was now 'all good' rather than the 'all bad' villain he'd been 24 hours prior. So. Just saying, lots of possibility for unpleasant drama and you may want to get a lawyer up to speed so the legal drama doesn't blindside you. Even if she's not deliberately setting you up as part of a longer-term plan (and don't discount that), the short-term drama can be devastating.

Hang in there.

@grav ... :lol: I'm under medical care, believe me! Or do you think it's chemo-brain? :p:
You should have more confidence in yourself ...

Thanks. The diagnosis is mine. She is able to paint a different face to the outside world.
(gone girl)

I'l lawyering up asap, in any case.

I haven't read Gone Girl, but the whole being able to present a very different face to the world, a put-together, believable face, is very typical of the diagnosis. That's how my relative would manage to get her husband hauled off in shackles time after time. Only when someone really pinned down her story detail by detail would it fall apart. But she's very high-functioning and believable when putting her best foot forward, so to speak.

Sounds like I should read Gone Girl.

It's frightening.

I got nothing but cliches & well wishes for ya. Hang in there... It gets better ...
blah blah blah... Seriously. keep your head about you and start playing chess - you gotta be at least a couple moves ahead of what she MAY be doing, just in case. The lawyer is a good start, but remember - The longer a lawyer can drag this out, the more THEY make.