The sunny side of life gives me sunburn!
 

It seems that lately people keep telling me I should be grateful for what I do have. Unfortunately, Pollyanna I'm not. Deep in my brain I KNOW that the glass is not only half empty, its probably completely empty. I don't believe there's a reason for everything and things always turn out for the best. I think evil aliens are messing with our lives just for kicks and the only reason they do it is because it amuses them.

And I am a material girl at heart. I want a warm winter coat, a laptop with all the latest bells and whistles, cable TV with Showtime, on demand movies, HBO, and Animal Planet. I also want a Jaguar. Car that is. :violin:

There are days when I work on cultivating a good attitude, but I have a deep mental twist that demands that now and then I just let the old bad ass-I deserve more-and I'm right-and you're stupid attitude take over. I try to stay away from innocent people when I'm having one of those days.

Does anyone else have difficulty always being chirpy or am I even wierder than I thought?

Sam - I'm having a few of those days lately myself.

It helps if I remember that I'm not a beggar in Calcutta, but just (helps, I mean)

aren't you a friend of Bills??? maybe it's meeting time???

my father hates me. he always has - from the moment of my birth I have intruded upon his happiness and personal fortune. He reminds me of this daily but I let him do it. With every breath I take, I recall how much he hates my very essence.

I've been trying to overcome the furnace of his loathing for years and years and I am losing the fight right now.

how's that for self pity? :)

I think it's normal to feel that way, occasionally. Except for the Jaguar. That's just weird. Any self-respecting dreamer would want a Lamborghini. ;)

As to the evil aliens I firmly believe they are coming back (all you Mayan followers are WRONG) Dec 24 of this year, and I believe that I am a specimen they will want to take back for further research. Frankly, I cannot WAIT! I will be the best alien house pet EVER.

p.s. Sorry to post over you, Bri. :(

post over what? my whine-fest?

I do it to myself - I'm just XXtra sensitive today. i work so hard for him to not bother me...but lately I'm losing AND IT'S MY OWN FAULT!

now. I don't want to take away from Sammy here. Go for it, kiddo!

THAT'S a whine-fest? Girl, you don't know from whine-fest. ;)

:comfort: to you both.

Yeah, Bill's my buddy. Did you know he experimented with LSD and was often unfaithful to Lois? Lois returned the favor by having an affair with one of Bill's sponsees.

True!

But I'm going to chair a meeting at noon anyway. I don't think the topic is going to be gratitude, either.

i.m., good luck in your new career as alien house pet. Just make sure you don't fall down any black holes! ;)

An always chirpy person is weird...:neutral:

Brianna: I'm sorry to hear how your father feels about you. Is there a way you can stay away from him? I hope you'll feel better soon. It sucks how someone's feelings affect ours.

thanks, Lola Bunny.

I really can't stay away for too long as he's 82 and needs my help sometimes (although he would say I need HIS help!) I just have to learn to have dinosaur skin around him. he's a toxic person.

I guess we differ here. I think you can choose not to associate with toxic people - even relatives. I'd either let him get by on his own - or if you really can't go that route, tell him to stfu when he gets toxic.

Please to explain how any of those things will make you happy.

Having money doesn't make you happy, but it sure makes unhappiness more comfortable. ;)

Why in the fuck should you be grateful for what you have?

you have an employer who blatantly breaks the law re pay/hours/everything, but you can't report him because there's nothig else out there....

you have a disability retraining claim thingy that's causing you enough stress to put anyone back onto disability....

you have a friend with schizophrenia who's worryingly ill and dropped off the radar

and you're in a clique with reblicans in denial...

What's not to hate? ;)

I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be grateful. But being pollyanna helps you drag yourself out of it. it does me, eventually. Once I've had time to dismiss all the wankers.

=

Well, most of that stuff might make me happy for a day or two, but the warm winter coat would make me happy until at least March or April. :p:

Thanks, Monster. Everyone at my AA meeting today told me I should be grateful, and I DO have things I'm grateful for, but I hate when people try to brainwash me into gratitude I'm not feeling at the moment. :right:

I was thumbing through People at the doc's office yesterday. They had pictures of Johnny Depp on his yacht with his family, and quoted him from some time ago saying "Money doesn't buy happiness, but it'll buy the yacht that pulls up right alongside it!"

And monster nailed it.

We're supposed to be 'fine' all the time. How are you? Oh, I'm 'fine.'

We're not always fine, Sam, and we all need to stop skating around it and admit it when we're not. :)

edit: Johnny Depp would go a long way in making me happy. :lol:

Take one example. Couple weeks ago I went with my wife and kids to Hershey Park. With 2 nights in a hotel, meals out, gas, and admission to the park, it cost around $500. It was a lot more fun than staying home.

I could have done the trip solo, but it wouldn't have been much fun at all. So it was my family that made it really fun, but staying home with that same family wouldn't have been nearly as much fun.

Hi infinite monkey, how are you today?

I didn't think warm winter coat fit on that list, unless you already have a warm winter coat.

I'm fine. How are you? :p:

I'm fine, too. It's a beautiful fall day and I just decided to work from home.

Thanks for asking.

Maybe I should send you mine? Except you'd have to like pink and the postage would be ruinous.

I bought it to shut Mum up. She was distressed that I did not have a winter coat. For 360 days of the year I do not need one, and layering is sufficient for the rest. In fact I bought a range of coats/ jackets at her instigation.

She moaned this summer that she had too many of my coats in her wardrobe (the HUGE pink one, my Captain Jack 3/4 length and my lightweight white jacket). I suggested I gave them all to the charity shop and just got by with my wool cape. She wouldn't hear of it.

My white jacket is now at school. I don't expect to wear it for at least two months, and that will only be because I am standing still as a playtime supervisor. And my boobies are too big for my military coat :mecry: Damn I need to lose weight.

Thanks for thinking of me, Sundae. I have a major problem finding coats in thrift stores because I too need to lose some weight. Maybe heavy-set women don't donate to charity? Lucky for me, last winter was relatively mild and I got by with a fake fur lined hoodie thing. But last winter was unusual - normally we get cold and lots of snow.

Yeah, I imagine mailing a coat from the UK would cost more than the coat was worth. I have until about November, so I figure I can save some each week from my pay (if I can refrain from killing the owner) and buy a brand new coat. There's some nice ones that aren't too expensive in the LL Bean and Lands End catalogs.

I got mine from eBay - at least you can search from home and by a specific size there.
If you want to PM me your size I can find out what postage would be?

You can find some good deals at Sierra Trading Post (http://www.sierratradingpost.com/wom...d-coats~d~261/). They have very liberal return policies, so if you don't like it, or it doesn't fit, you can send it back. We buy a lot of stuff from them.