Am I just running in circles?
 

I have never liked my town much (lived here for 2 years now), and in the last couple of months, I have felt like a prisoner plotting a prison break. I want out!

The reasons? This town is small and isolated. There seems to be no doctor here who is experienced with ADHD which I suffer from, and the treatment I get is substandard at best. Plus, there are zero cultural or any other activities here unless you count the sheep auction on Thursdays. Oh, and there's a prairie dog shoot once a year.

There are some good points to this place. The rents are low and so is the crime. I have two good friends here that I would miss. And most important, I have a part time job here with a boss who is very understanding of my ADHD, and that money is vital for my income. And I'm older and maybe I shouldn't just be running around the country like I did in my younger days. Although I'm not senile and don't need a walker - yet. Go while the goings good, I'm thinking.

I got all excited about moving to Missoula, Montana until I found out they have lots and lots of days with no sun. Sun is a priority to this Southwestern girl! Now I am considering two towns closer by. One is Durango which has a college and lots of amenities. Plus, it is only 50 miles away, and I could see my friends now and then. Durango has more jobs, too.

But would I be able to find such an understanding boss again in Durango? And the rents are pretty high.

The other town I'm looking at (Montrose) is further away, but bigger than where I am now. Everybody I've talked to online and in real life says its a nice place with moderate rents. I have driven through there a few times, and its in one of the prettier parts of Colorado. I'd have to drive two hours to get medical care in Grand Junction, but it has great medical facilities, and the two hour drive beats the four hour drive I'd have to take to get ANYWHERE from here.

I know I'm going to have the same personal problems where ever I go, and as they say, where ever I am I take me along. So do my thoughts of a move make sense or am I just running away as I have so often in the past?

We've heard what you don't like. What do you want/need that you're not getting where you are?

Vacation time is all. Itchy feet. Although some people just aren't made to settle down in one place.

In my little town
I grew up believing
God keeps his eye on us all
And he used to lean upon me
As I pledged allegiance to the wall
Lord I recall my little town
Coming home after school
Riding my bike past the gates of the factories
My mom doing the laundry
Hanging out shirts in the dirty breeze
And after it rains there's a rainbow
And all of the colors are black
It's not that the colors aren't there
It's just imagination they lack
Everything's the same back in my little town

In my little town I never meant nothing
I was just my father's son
Saving my money
Dreamin of glory
Twitching like a finger on a trigger of a gun

Leaving nothing but the dead and dying back in my little town
Leaving nothing but the dead and dying back in my little town
Leaving nothing but the dead and dying back in my little town...

Did you consider Helena, Montana?

We have plenty of sunny days. We have theater, opera, art galleries. We have all of the outdoor stuff you'd like. Rents are low. People are nice.

BTW, my favorite place to live is in a college town. Best of both worlds.

I want to live in Delaware OH and work at Ohio Wesleyan. I was there for a seminar years ago and my then boss said "This town is so YOU."


Or, the other side of the earth might work. Or a thousand miles away would really work. :(

I hate my town too. I have no options right now. I just HATE. MY. TOWN. And I've been there since college, some "mumblemumble" years ago.

It feels like circles, vicious ones that you can't escape. Maybe if I found some better shoes. ;)

We've lived in five different cities now. In many ways it's easy to move. Just interview and get a job in your target town. Get the job and you're good to go. In many cases, they will even pay to move you.

Well, I mentioned some of it - adequate medical care; access to cultural things like music, art, famous guest speakers who often lecture at the college. Also, people who won't think I'm from outer space because I have a college degree; people who won't think I'm a devil worshipper because I'm Buddhist; a bookstore (the only one here closed 2 years ago since no one can read); access to ANY store other than Walmart, more reasonable tax licensing, so I can start up my old business again - Cortez makes it impossible - in Durango its practically a cakewalk. Need I go on?

Liked your poem, footx3. That pretty much sums it up, except we don't have factories here - just cows and sheep.

Excellent. Now can you quantify how much happier you will be if/when you have those things?

It's actually Simon and Garfunkel

How did you end up where you are now?

The short version is that I like the West Slope in general, plus I got a deal on housing I couldn't refuse. And I had a horrific break-up back home with a guy I had been involved with for 6 years. I decided a fresh start was in order.

The long version I'm saving for my novel! ;)

So go.

No bookshop?
Well, with amazon, you've always got a bookshop, but I get the point. The town is (a) small and (b) not into reading.

Is there a library, at least?

Yeah, I get my books thru Amazon, but its not the same as browsing the shelves in a good book store. We do have a library, but its small, and I often can't find what I want there. I got at least a couple of months to think about this, so I'm hoping I won't do anything rash! But Durango is looking better all the time!

I wanted to live in Durango. that was a million years ago

some where out west sounds Good

As long as we're doing lyrics

I've been wanderin' early and late
From New York City to the Golden Gate
And it don't look like
I'll ever stop my wanderin'

My daddy was an engineer
My brother drives a hack
My sister takes in laundry
While the baby balls the jack
And it don't look like
I'll ever stop my wanderin'

I've been in the army
I've worked on a farm
And all I've got to show is the muscle in my arm
And it don't look like
I'll ever stop my wanderin'

My ma she died when I was young
My daddy took to stealin' and he got hung
And it don't look like
I'll ever stop my wanderin'

Snakes in the ocean
Eels in the sea
I let a redheaded woman make a fool out of me
And it don't look like
I'll ever stop my wanderin'

I've been wanderin' early late
From the New York City to the Golden Gate
And it don't look like
I'll ever stop my wanderin'
No, it don't look like
I'll ever stop my wanderin'

I am still living with your ghost
Lonely and dreaming of the west coast
I don't want to be your downtime
I don't want to be your stupid game

With my big black boots and an old suitcase
I do believe I'll find myself a new place
I don't want to be the bad guy
I don't want to do your sleepwalk dance anymore
I just want to see some palm trees
I will try and shake away this disease


We can live beside the ocean
Leave the fire behind
Swim out past the breakers
Watch the world die


I am still dreaming of your face
Hungry and hollow for all the things you took away


I don't want to be your good time
I don't want to be your fall-back crutch anymore


I'll walk right out into a brand new day
Insane and rising in my own weird way
I don't want to be the bad guy


I don't want to do your sleepwalk dance anymore
I just want to feel some sunshine
I just want to find some place to be alone


We can live beside the ocean
Leave the fire behind
Swim out past the breakers
Watch the world die